Mound Conference Theater
For September 8th.
Melvin: So, while we’re waiting for Villone… you guys want to go out after the game, get something to eat?
Bloomquist: Sorry Bob, I’ve got to… uh… do my ab workout.
Melvin: What about you guys?
Olivo: No way, you have the stench of losing about you. It spoils my appetite.
Bloomquist: And you know, an ab workout, that takes a long time. So I can’t go to dinner.
Cabrera: I’m going to… walk over here.
Olivo: Thornton had three strikeouts and you’re going to take him out for Villone? What are you thinking?
Melvin: Thirteen Coins, maybe? Don’t they have those little steak medallions?
Bloomquist: I’m not lying about the workout just so I don’t have to go to dinner with you.
Boone: Hey, guys, have you seen the ballgirls tonight? They’re smoking.
Bloomquist: Hey, Mr. Boone.
Boone: Shut up.
Melvin: I’m thinking about going to Thirteen Coins tonight, Booney.
Olivo: The wild pitch, that was my fault. Let Thornton go for the third out, then start the eighth with a righty against Belliard, and you save Villone.
Boone: I’m just saying.
Bloomquist: What’s taking Villone so long?
Melvin: So Booney, you want to go? Hit Thirteen Coins? Steak medallions….
Boone: Uhhh… noooo, I’m going straight home, I taped the Amazing Race last night–
Olivo: Oh, I love that show. Those bowling moms are really getting on my nerves. “Oh, we’re in last place, oh, we’re so unlucky.”
Melvin: Sounds sort of like me.
Olivo: You’re still here?
Cabrera: He scares off the women, too, and when he tries to make friends with the waiter…
Cabrera: It’s embarassing, man. We were at this steakhouse, he kept calling everyone by these nicknames…
Lopez: Like with the y?
Villone: Como estas, amigos
Lopez: What is that, are you practicing for your retirement as a greeter at Azteca?
Cabrera: For someone who looks like they jog in from the bullpen you take your sweet time.
Villone: I’m not young and fast like you boys. How’s that rosin bag treating you, Boone, you see that ball girl tonight?
Bloomquist: Hey, Mr. Villone
Villone: Shut up.
Boone: You going to get some grounders for me?
Villone: You going to catch them?
Melvin: Okay, so Broussard —
Olivo: We know, go back to the dugout and mark another day off your calendar.
Villone: What’s up, Bob, you’re not going to have Thornton finish the inning?
Melvin: Hey come on, boys, give me a break.
Bloomquist: Umpire, Mr. Villone.
Villone: Okay, let’s get this over with. Break!