Live Game Notes

Jeff · June 17, 2005 at 1:45 am · Filed Under Mariners 

While in attendance for all 12 innings of tonight’s ordeal, certain observations came to me in no particular order. Out of respect for baseball’s non-linearity, they are presented as such.

* Adrian Beltre’s hamstring must really be hurting if he wasn’t available to pinch-hit for Dave Hansen or Rene Rivera at any point in the game, especially that last inning.

* Umpire Michel Foucault did a fantastic job tonight in deconstructing the notion of a stable strike zone. Often, officiants reify the static rulebook norms into oppositional binaries of “balls” and “strikes” in a clear exercise of disciplinary power. Tonight, these totalizing expectations were dismantled in a singular 12-frame act of micro-political resistance.

* Three quick points about bumper music for batters.

Raul Ibanez increased my respect for him by choosing the excellent “Me, Myself and I” from De La Soul’s classic “Three Feet High and Rising.”

If the team store charges hundreds of dollars for an Ichiro autograph, imagine how much they would charge for a karaoke recording of him doing “In The Club.”

Late in the game, they played the Beastie Boys’ “Sabotage” before a Bret Boone at bat. The joke about what he does to run-scoring chances makes itself.

* Actual conversation with pal, part one. Raul Ibanez steps to the dish against Rheal Cormier with the M’s trailing by one. Me: “Unlike Ichiro, Ibanez is totally lost against lefties.” Pal: Nods. Ibanez: Hits game-tying home run.

* Michael Morse has real power. His line-drive double to drive in the Mariners’ first run looked to me like a sure single, because it hit the outfield grass so soon — but there was such force on the ball it split the gap between Lofton and Michaels.

* If you kick over someone’s beer at Safeco, you should at least make a show of going to the ATM and buying them another one. After booting a full Foster’s, “sorry” is a day late and about $8 short.

* Actual conversation with pal, part two. As Bret Boone comes up against Billy Wagner, I opine that the only real question is how many pitches it will take Wagner to notch the strikeout. Four, says I. Six, says friend. Correct answer: three.

* This move ended up working out, but I still disagree with taking out Eddie Guardado after one inning, the 11th. The first batter up in the ensuing frame was Chase Utley, a lefty with power. why not let Eddie, your best reliever and a guy that mows down lefties, take him on instead of Mateo?

If Utley homers there, Mike Hargrove wins a free stay at the luxury hotel in Second-Guess City.

* The Terrace Club seats have major advantages, including easy bathroom access and proximity to a full bar. Most stark, though, is the distinction between condiment bars. In the T.C., I counted eight different types of mustard. Eight! At the ground levels, you’re lucky if you get a non-congealed packet of gritty Yellow No. 5 dye.

There are drawbacks, too, like the nearby folks who whooped in glee after Bob Abreu got thrown out at second base in the eighth inning. Awash in liquid refreshment, they assumed that this nullified the run Kenny Lofton scored in the same sequence.

I kept waiting for Umpire Foucault to declare that runs and errors are co-productive, activating the umpire-space and decentering the scoreboard-subject. But then he would have had to eject Charlie Manuel, and that would have been an exercise of sovereign biopower, so he let it stand.

Manuel’s scoreboard photo, by the way, looks like Emperor Palpatine’s paler brother.

* Actual conversation with pal, part three. My prediction for announced attendance? 26,800. My friend’s prediction? 28,100. Actual announced attendance? 27,162.

This was an accurate estimate, if you had about nine $8 Foster’s and were seeing double.


73 Responses to “Live Game Notes”

  1. Evan on June 17th, 2005 1:18 pm

    The only place I’ve ever had a Roggenweizen (thanks for the spelling) was at Steamworks in Vancouver. Very tasty.

    Know anyone who brews a nice barley wine? I’m a big fan of Old Nick, but I don’t like having to import it myself.

  2. Dead Ball Tim on June 17th, 2005 1:54 pm

    When it comes to beer I have only two words: Newcastle Brown

  3. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:00 pm

    Evan: Yes, Steamworks is the only place that brews a roggenweizen that I’m aware of. And again, theirs is really just a variant of a dunkelweizen (which freakin’ rule). If you like that weizen flavor, I highly recommend Franziskaner’s Dunkelweizen, and Baron Brewing have both a dunkel and a uber-weizen that is just amazing.

    As for barleywines, you could hit the aforementioned Collins Pub on Second. I was there on Wed, prior to the game, and they had Breidablik from Hood Canal Brewing, and a barleywine from Winthrop. I’d also recommend checking out Brouwer’s in Fremont, as they frequently have a fair amount of barleywines on tap.

    You can buy Old Nick at the Fred Meyer in Bremerton, I don’t know about over here. I’d bet money they have it at Ballard Market, Central Market (Shoreline), and I’m positive they carry it at Bottleworks.

    As to Newcastle, it’s very much not my pint o’ bliss. Too sweet for this beer drinker. My current beers of choice are Fat Bastard and Imperial Stout, both from Silver City in Silverdale.

  4. Evan on June 17th, 2005 2:04 pm

    I actually live in Vancouver – I guess I’m heading down to Bremerton sometime soon.

    Thanks a bunch.

  5. Jeff on June 17th, 2005 2:06 pm

    Boundary Bay in Bellingham does a nice barley wine.

  6. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:09 pm

    I’m jealous. I had Steamworks Espresso Stout at the last Great Canadian Beer Festival, and it was spectacular. One of the best Canadian stouts at the festival, but I’d give Best Overall Stout to The Back Hand of God, from Crannog. Damn, that was a great beer. I’m surprised that the BC Liquor Stores don’t have Old Nick. If you’re in Vancouver, there’s a small beer specialty store in Bellingham that may have it, The Bottle Shoppe. And, hey, they actually have a decent looking website now: I’ve never been there, but if you ever end up in Bellingham, stop in at Boundary Bay. Their Imperial Oatmeal Stout is delicious.

  7. Shoeless Jose on June 17th, 2005 2:20 pm

    Big Time Brewing does a barleywine in the autumn. They don’t advertise it, and it goes quickly, so you have ask. You can get quarts to go, though 😉

    Leavenworth Brewery does a Dunkleweizen, and you can find it on tap sometimes around Seattle.

    How did we go from deconstructivism to “I drink therefore I am”? Oh wait, fans of a nihilist team always follow that path…

  8. Evan on June 17th, 2005 2:20 pm

    BC has socialised liquor distribution – there’s no private importing. The availablity of beer is largely in the hands of bureaucrats (though there is a fair amount of smuggling from Alberta).

    That said, I do get to visit the Steamworks pub pretty regularly. 🙂

  9. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:24 pm

    Jose: I think Big Time is also releasing a special barleywine this month. Yep, their Old Sol Barleywine is released on the 21st. I’ll have to get over there soon, and start filling up my punchcard. Just don’t go to Leavenworth hoping to get the Blind Pig straight from the brewery. They were bought out by Fish in Olympia, and now all production happens there. That said, the Fish Bowl is a great place to have a beer, and their barrel aged Poseidon is abso-frickin-lutely amazing.

  10. Evan on June 17th, 2005 2:29 pm

    This government web site lists every product available for sale (legally) in BC.

  11. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:36 pm

    That’s interesting. They carry a couple of Young’s beers, but not Old Nick. Bizarre. Well, the Double Chocolate Stout is worth trying.


  12. Shoeless Jose on June 17th, 2005 2:41 pm

    The distribution of liquor in the states is pretty messed up as well (and the recent Supreme ruling on interstate wine sales doesn’t really improve things much). Producers of hard liquor can’t sell directly to retailers; they have to go through a state sanctioned wholesaler. Down in Oregon McMenamins opened a “Stillpub” (like a brewpub, but with their own brandy, gin, etc). By law they’re not allowed to take their spirits directly from the distillery to the pub, so they had to get licensed as a distributer and move the bottles to a special separate OLCC warehouse (within the same building) before taking them to the pub.

  13. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:43 pm

    All hail Prohibition, and the post-repeal implementation of the three tier system!

    Oh, wait, only the distributors hail the three tier system. The rest of us get all pissed off about it. But hey, it’s saving America from alcoholism! Except for all those people who are alcoholics. I’d deconstruct that, but my head hurts enough as it is.

  14. Paul Molitor Cocktail on June 17th, 2005 2:45 pm

    Foster’s – Austrailian for ‘piss.’

  15. Knuckles on June 17th, 2005 2:49 pm

    You’d think the Aussies would have the good sense just to say ‘piss’. It’s shorter.

  16. paul on June 17th, 2005 3:04 pm

    Nobody in Australia (at least not the ones by where I used to go in Sydney) actually drinks Foster’s – they mostly drink Victoria Bitter, (which is actually made by Foster’s nowadays, but didn’t used to be, back in the olden days), and which is confusingly not bitter.

  17. Steve on June 17th, 2005 4:10 pm

    Went into the men’s room at a place in Idaho Falls about ten years ago – above each urinal the owner had posted sign: Please flush twice. It’s a long way to Golden.”

  18. Everett on June 17th, 2005 5:03 pm

    My congratulations on the excellent philosphy of the strike zone in this thread, as a philosophy major on the other side of the state at Gonzaga.

    Plato: The strike zones we see are mere shadows of the Ideal Strike Zone, and participate in StrikeZoneitude only as much as they share the properties of the Ideal Strike Zone.

  19. Colm on June 17th, 2005 7:00 pm

    Ahh, late in the day, but I liked the Foucault crack although he helped to make my days at fine art school more miserable than should have been the case.

    I liked the “Judy” Bloomquist jibe even better.

    And I agree wholeheartedly on the beer protocol. At the last game I attended a child cracked my new 16 ouncer climbing over the back of her seat, and I had to watch the precious fluid seep out of the cracks more quickly than I could quaff most of it. I tried my best, but it doesn’t feel good skulling one beer when it costs more than a six pack.

  20. Kyle on June 17th, 2005 10:28 pm

    Just wondering if there are any policy debaters here? A lot of that Foucault language reminded me of bad old Circle K kritiks from 5 years ago. To those of you who has no idea what that means, sorry :/

  21. Jeff on June 18th, 2005 1:05 am

    Both Derek and I are old policy debaters.

  22. Tom on June 18th, 2005 3:56 pm

    The Terrace Club seats are over-priced. Although one can apply that to the whole Mariner experience — $55 tickets, $20 parking, $8 beer, $5 hot dog.

    I agree with the original post that there’s some benefits to the TC … namely:

    * Multiple mustards (although all too frequently the bottles are full)
    * Close-in bathrooms
    * Full Bar Access (that I haven’t taken advantage of, although there have been plently of games that would lead one to drink)
    * Open bar seating inside (high bar and chairs along the back of every section)
    * In-seat food service

    I also agree with the original post that there’s some drawbacks to the TC … namely:

    * Open bar seating squatters – People who buy a $43 ticket and camp out in the bar seats behind the closest sections to home page.
    * Volunteer Groups at the counters – who don’t know how to run the hot dogs, the beer taps, and most importantly the cash register. “How do I run a credit card?” And of course the always fun … “I’m sorry, I can’t sell you beer, since I’m underage. Can someone pour this guy a beer?”
    * Even though you paid $55 for a ticket, it doesn’t eliminate proximity to the idiots. Including types I’ll call:
    * The Casual Fan – Talk, Talk, Talk, Talk … about nothing to do with baseball
    * The Scoreboard Fan – Pays close attention to the Hat Trick, the Music Quiz, and *particularly* the Hyrdo Race and nothing else baseball-related
    * The Daddy’s Money Fan – Multiple gangs of high school and college kids with nice seats specializing in loud irritating behavior again having nothing to do with the game
    * The Jumbotron Fan – Please camera man put me/us on!!!
    * The Marionette Fan – Only responds to the scoreboard operators commands … NOISE, LOUDER … then immediately falls silent.

    Now … how long is the waiting list for the Diamond Club?

  23. Tom on June 18th, 2005 3:59 pm

    oops … that should be … “Multiple mustards (although all too frequently the bottles are **empty**)” …