Game 121, Mariners at Angels
DMZ · August 17, 2006 at 6:00 pm · Filed Under Mariners
LHP Jamie Moyer v RHP Kelvim Escobar, 7:05, FSN.
Okay, gotta break out of this funk, right, who better to do it than Jamie, right?
YOUR IGNITOR-RIFFIC LINEUP!!!!!oneone!!!
RF-L Ichiro
2B-R Lopez
3B-R Beltre
LF-L Ibanez
1B-R Sexson
DH-L Broussard
C-R Johjima
SS-R Betancourt
Bloomquist, since he without notice took over the CF job: .313/.450/.563 !! It’s September 2002 all over again!!!!! HOORAY FOR BLOOMQUIST!!!
ALL HAIL BOOM BOOM WILLIE!!!!!11!!!!!1 b00m b00m w1ll13 == teh winnah!!!
If Jones isn’t going to play, he should be in Tacoma taking the field. Bloomquist is not the future of the franchise in center field.
Given this slide, what more pretext does the team require to make a managerial change?
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Um, aren’t the M’s playing the Angels tonight? In Ana…er in LA
I’m worried people, I think Derek is having a nervous breakdown. Someone get the man a beer, wait he recommended bringing back Carl…get the man several!
So Derek, are you being sarcastic, or are you just happy with the lineup?
How often do teams fire a manager in mid-August? It seems kind of pointless. Not that I wouldn’t do it, and not that it isn’t badly needed, but I won’t be holding my breath for the M’s to whack him.
Whack him? That’d make me even happier than if they just fired him.
Willie B. Can’t live with him, can’t be scrappy without him.
With the very hypothetical future in mind, I’m now cheering for the M’s to lose four out of every five games. Hopefully they lose by a score of 1-0 on Felix starts (still want the kid to dominate), win 4-2 when Meche starts (for supplemental pick), lose 5-4 when Moyer starts (thanks for the memories Jamie, but it’s time to move on), lose 10-9 when Woods starts, and lose 7-6 when Washburn starts.
Advantages: Moyer retires respectably, Meche’s “value” is high enough to earn a supplemental draft pick when he leaves, Washburn is exposed as the 4th or 5th guy he is, Felix dominates but just barely loses, and Woods ensures that he isn’t an option for next year. The team then fires Bavasi and hires me as the new GM, along with any random manager with a basic understanding of FIP and OPS.
If this works, the M’s end up with a top draft pick in a much better draft year (2007) as well as the bonus pick. This also confirms that the roster should only return two starters (Felix, ace, and Washburn, innings eater), allowing me to sign Matsuzaka (long term) and Schmidt (three years, local discount).
Also, Benuardo will finish 2006 hitting like right and left handed versions of Pujols, while Richie pops enough long balls to warrant trade market value. We’ll use the open salary on Matsu, and be a strong rebuilding team in 2007. 2008 will be our year; our starting rotation of Felix, Matsu, Schmidt, Morrow, and Lowe will do just fine in the postseason, where we’ll stomp the surging young Angels in the ALCS before dismantling the Mets in the big show. Our insanely successful Johjima/Clement catching platoon (co-MVP’s of the Series) will change the way the position is managed forever.
Meet me, Marcus Dorsey, humble chiropractic student turned GM genius. And I’ll always credit Dave and Derek for shaping my baseball philosophy and vision, despite how much DMZ’s spelling fetish creeped me out along the way.
I do not grok why Willie is in the lineup! Did Michael (Meyers) Hargrove have a stroke or does he seriously not give a rats ass?
Could you imagine if Willie got hurt? Mike would be on the bench tomorrow rocking back and forth with a blank line-up card wondering what to do.
Leyland just used Zumaya in the 6th (the sixth!) to get out of a bases-loaded jam.
8 – That better have been a save situation, or Mr. Leyland sure doesn’t know the right way to manage a baseball team.
I saw that, stupid move. Guy should only pitch in the 8th or 9th inning. On a different topic, you are a little off base on the lead. Bavasi ordered Grover to play Ian, Grover agreed but the jerk never showed up. What could he do???
Hip Hip Hoouray for Willie-Willie-Wonthit!
I SUBMITTED WILLYZ PIKTURE TO KITTENWAR.COM AND HE WON 100%OF BATTLES BEFORE HE WAS DISCOVERED BY BOSSES AND TAKEN DOWN!!!!!!
BLOOMQUIST >>> KITTNES
Is Zumaya just gonna be a reliever now, or is the rotation his destination?
Is there’s some sort of statistic that says we gotta win a game sometime? When was their last losing streak this bad?
wILLIE COULD BE BOTH ROTATION AND RELIEVER AND THROW FASTER THAN ZUMAYA ZUMAYA SUCKS!!!
STATISTICS KNEEL BEFORE BOOM-BOOM!!!
ZMD, your allready becomming more likeuble! TY! Furst tyme youv’e maid me lol!
8- Leyland just used Zumaya in the 6th (the sixth!) to get out of a bases-loaded jam.
Zumaya can take them to the 7th. Kudos to Leyland for realizing what a high leverage situation is. Especially considering that Zumaya has converted on 25 straight saves. It must be nice to have a manager who uses his head once in awhile.
I realize that they want to let Hargrove just finish out the year, but seriously the after this collapse the last two weeks the Front Office needs to give the fans some reassurance that they are committed to being a winning franchise. They need to hold someone responsible for this disaster.
Seriously, why is Willie Bloomquist starting tonight? Does Bavasi/Hargrove still intend to give him a shot as a starter?
Solution to all problems
let Willie make the lineup.
QWIK STAT
Mariners with no Bloomquist at-bats = 35-26
Mariners when Bloomquist has an at-bat = 21-38
QWIK FACT: Bloomquist has not yet this year had a game where he came to the plate only once and drew a walk in that PA.
Bloomquist b-b-b-breakdown:
5 PA: Team is 4-3
4 PA: Team is 10-14
3 PA: Team is 5-10
2 PA: Team is 0-6
1 PA: Team is 2-5
0 PA: Team is 35-26
Oh come on, Hargrove. You’ve made this season a miserable experience, can you at least start Doyle so I can have one goddamn reason to watch tonight?
24 – they seem to do better when he has 5 PA than they do when he had 4. Maybe if they just figured out a way to get him 6 or better yet 7!
The world would explode if he ever got more than 5 PAs.
Can’t start Doyle. Anything remotely resembling logic in the clubhouse is disallowed.
Careful there, MaDMZ – I bet you’d have wagered multiple testicles that we wouldn’t see a Willie double followed two games later by a HR this week.
The times they are a’changin’ (though not toward future potential, clearly..)
Derek, have you been takin your pills?
Willie was way cool
Everybody liked Willie
Everybody wanted to hang out with him
Anything he wanted to do, he did
He turned water into wine
And if he wanted to
He could have turned wheat into marijuana
Or sugar into cocaine
Or vitamin pills into amphetamines
He walked on the water
And swam on the land
He would tell these stories
And people would listen
He was really cool
If you were blind or lame
You just went to Willie
And he would put his hands on you
And you would be healed
That’s so cool
He could’ve played guitar better than Hendrix
He could’ve told the future
He could’ve baked the most delicious cake in the world
He could’ve scored more goals than Wayne Gretzky
He could’ve danced better than Barishnikov
Willie could have been funnier than any comedian you can think of
Willie was way cool
He told people to eat his body and drink his blood
That’s so cool
Willie was so cool
But then some people got jealous of how cool he was
So they killed him
But then he rose from the dead
He rose from the dead, danced around
Then went up to heaven
I mean, that’s so cool
Willie was way cool
No wonder he gets so many at bats
Besides, they clearly just called Doyle up as a good luck charm/clubhouse motivator. If Eddie Guardado and Carl Everett had an illegitimate love-child, even their love-child couldn’t motivate this team as much as Doyle’s rousing oratory can.
Starting Willy Bloomquist
MINUS EV!!!!
Derek’s gone insane.
The post has gone through 3 revisions in the last 5 minutes, haha.
I think you need some rosy clouded ones too. Y’know, sorta how Hargrover sees him in the clubhouse.
More than 3. Like my hero Willie Bloomquist, I am scrappy and dedicated and my efforts are futile
lolscrappy
Regarding #6, and DMZ’s subsequent posts:
In all seriousness, DMZ (even with today’s slump) is hovering somewhere around 99% in the grammatical correctness of his posts. I, however, am lingering somewhere closer to 85%. Should we conclude, based solely on this crude statistic, that DMZ is a superior speller and writer?
Not so fast.
In my case, small sample size can be misleading. When you examine my peripheral writing, as well as keyboard-adjusted error quotients, it is probably more likely that my career average will end up somewhere in the 90-94% range, putting me well above Corco, Lauren, and Argh!, but probably below the class of the greats (Dave, msb, or Free Dan Rohn!). My college numbers suggest that my sustainable ceiling is probably no higher than 94%, which will not easily be exceeded without performance enhancing spell-checkers or other (less ethical) software. This keeps me just beyond the reach of the elite.
In short, Hooligan = Michael Young of the posting world. DMZ = Albert Pujols. If Pujols can be obsessive-compulsive about his swing, Derek should certainly be allowed a spelling fetish.
Adam Kennedy got his aaaassss handed to him.
It’s not a slump if you’re making outs intentionally.
…as well as keyboard-adjusted error quotients…
What could’ve happened to your keyboard to cause such a huge adjustment? Wait, wait, don’t answer that.
It’s not a slump if you’re making outs intentionally.
Right, making outs intentionally is what followers of the Hargrove school of thought like to call ‘managing.’
Adam Kennedy is out the whole series? That really sucks…for the Mariners.
39… those are productive outs, I’ll have you know. GO SCRAPPY!
Willie “Bruce Dickinson” Bloomquist to reporters in clubhouse:
“Hey, fellas, I’m just like the rest of you. I put my pants on one leg at a time just like the rest of you. Only when I put on my pants, I make silver bats in them.”
If someone were to call Hargrove the “Human Brain Delay,” would that be clever, or if not clever, at least original?
Yeah, I didn’t think so.
Zumaya went two full innings with no hits, one walk, and 3Ks. And he’s not their closer. Depending on the night, Todd “Dazed and Confused” Muttonchop Jones or Fernando “ABBA” Rodney is the man. Tonight it was the former, with Rodney taking 8th inning duties. (How Jones with his 4.7+ ERA doesn’t have more blown saves I’ll never know). Leyland is actually using the best pitcher for the highest-leverage sitatuations (and without worring about whether it’s a “Save”), something which completely escapes Mike “men on, let’s put Mateo in” Hargrove.
I don’t understand why they’re batting Bloomquist 9th. He’s an outstanding basestealer, bunter, he can hit the ball to the right side of the infield and do the little things, he should hit #2 no question
Side effect of slump:
Ichiro telling agent: “Get me the righteous fuck out of this place.”
[if you know you're spelling it wrong, go look it up]
Up to post #39, I figured DMZ’s 11 year old son logged onto USSMariner.com….
(just kidding!!)
Personally, I’m now looking forward to the M’s setting some records. Has any team been consecutively swept by every other team in its division? That’s just 4 games away!
#47, #50. Oops. Maybe not.
I always thought Box of Rocks was a pretty hilarious nickname for Melvin. I’m surprised something as funny hasn’t been given Hargrove by USSM…
47 proves that DMZ is really KJR’s Steve Sandmeyer.
Up to post #39, I figured DMZ’s 11 year old son logged onto USSMariner.com……
I just thought JeffK had been acquired as a USSM author for a bag of twizzlers and a PTBNL.
Between the orbital headache DMZ has given me and the King Missile riffing, I’m not sure what to think.
Though “think” and “Mariner” are binary compounds that could take down ten airplanes and kill lots of people if the terrorists could survive the fumes, acid, and the premature explosion ripping off their unibrows.
I just heard the Mariners’ radio commercial: “I believe in Jarrod Washburn sliders and Joel Pineiro fastballs” ….
I think the deadline pressure of book revisions is getting to DMZ.
I turned it in early this morning. I’m off the hook for a little while. I went out biking today and everything.
There’s a chapter about that in his book!
Grover: “hi little rookie what you want?”
Jones: “Uh…More playing time sir…”
Grover: “Hmmmm….. Grover SMASH ROOKIE!!11!!
.229 is not sexy.
willay! free willay!
Imagining Hargrove as a screetchy-voiced, rather incompetent, blue muppet actually makes this season a lot easier to comprehend.
It also makes me wonder which muppet would make the best manager. Oscar? Not really motivational (though he does somewhat resemble Lou). Kermit? Too sensitive and eager to please. Piggy? Would be great on disputed calls, but clearly wouldn’t concentrate on managing (but would look fabulous in the dugout). Big Bird? Too trusting. Also not, techically, a muppet. Bert? Can’t manage without Ernie. Ernie? See Bert.
I think we should trade Willie, BTW. He could net us two or three top-shelf #1/1A starting pitchers, a power-hitting corner outfielder, and an excellent defensive catcher or three. Oh, and Albert Pujols. And Tony LaRussa. And the Springfield Cardinals, Gateway Arch, the Fox Theatre, an Uncle Tupelo reunion tour, and St. Louis native Jenna Fischer.
And they’d still rob us blind.
Scooter is the Bloomquist of muppets.
Hudler . . . . . Physioc . . . . . must . . . not . . . .crack . . .
Does anybody else find that the “MIke McGavick Is Listening” slogan really creeps them out? Makes me want to sweep my house for listening devices when I get home.
DMZ – I wonder if he fetches Grovers coffee too, since Scooter was more than happy to be a Go’fer.
65.
Springfield would riot if they lost their beloved Cardinals.
Evil Angels, taunting us with our lack of a Carl’s Jr.
Actually, 15 Carl’s Jr. eateries are coming to the greater Puget Sound region sometime in the next year. We ran an Associated Press story about it maybe six weeks ago.
Bert and Ernie are a platoon. Everyone knows Bert can’t hit lefties.
Bunson Honeydew would be derided as a Moneyball hire.
Evil Angels, taunting us with our lack of a Carl’s Jr.
It’s not that big a loss, really. OTOH, we don’t have Sonic, Chick-Fil-A, or In-N-Out. And that’s a localnationalregional tragedy.
Elmo = Joey Cora
Springfield would riot if they lost their beloved Cardinals.
They’ve hand them for what, three seasons? Lots of tradition there. Not like El Paso, 50-year member of the Texas League until SPRINGFIELD STOLE THEIR TEAM.
How is it Spokane has Carl’s Jr., wherever it is Corco lives has Chick-Fil-A, and the Seattle area has neither?
75 – We just got a Sonic down here..(Medford Oregon, or as I like to say, the ass end of Oregon.)
The universe is proportionately cooler as you approach Corco?
Carl’s Jr. is way overrated. It’s Jack in the Box at 3 times the price. Basically the Jarrod Washburn of California fast food.
78. I blame Starbucks.
At least I have the one and only Pat’s steaks in Philly.
Richie Sexson = Cookie Monster
Jamie Moyer = Oscar the Grouch
J.J. Putz = The Count
Does that make Mike Hargrove the Swedish chef?
The universe is proportionately cooler as you approach Corco?
This summer? When it’s been well over 100 degrees east of here?
We don’t have a Hardee’s, either. They had great biscuits. By great I mean crappy, but better than McDonalds.
My post was with my tongue firmly entrenched in my cheek, I live in springfield currently and have never attended a game but the natives are absolutely crazy for them and if you didn’t know better you’d swear they were a major league team with decades of roots here. I guess if I grew up here with the royals to the north I’d immediately latch on to any new team as well.
What about Lew Zealand? Eddie Guardado?
Carl’s is so-so. Sonic is so-so. All fast food is either so-so or less.
Sonic does have nice girls on roller skates that my 10 yr old finds quite entralling…
I suspect DMZ let Mr Corcoran post for him as a welcome to Washington. Or ???
Lawton/Borchard/Petagine: Snuffleupagus (before anyone else could see him)
Hardee’s == Carl’s Jr. Carl’s Jr bought them out 10+ years ago. All the Hardee’s west of the Mississippi are Carl’s Jrs now.
I don’t think they’ve cleaned those bathrooms since the merger, though.
I’m still a little disappointed that Carl Everett didn’t go “Animal” at some point as a Mariner.
And what’s with everyone being disappointed about the lack of chains in Seattle. What happened to the days when resented California businesses moving in and driving local establishments out of business. Down with In-N-Out! Up with Dick’s!
I haven’t liked Lew Zealand since he stopped letting nukes on his property.
Carl’s Jr. used to be a lot better. I hadn’t had it in years, but got a chicken sandwich a few weeks ago. I shall never go back to that place.
Is anyone else deeply disturbed when Neihaus calls sexson sexy? There’s something just not right about that..
Yeah! Up with dicks!
These probably don’t show much wear.
OH COME ON UMP! CLEARLY TEH W1LL13 CHECKED HIS SWING!!!!!
ALL YOUR CF IS BELONG TO W1LL13!
Lew Zealand threw boomerangs. Nothing Eddie threw ever came back to him.
I don’t think they’ve cleaned those bathrooms since the merger, though.
At least they’re keeping part of the Hardee’s tradition alive.
How about a Roy Rogers? We could build them in the rest stops, like in Jersey.
I love that Wikipedia is so horrible at so much stuff, but if you want pop culture, well, the Swedish Chef entry runs ~4 pages and contains episode capsules:
Lobster-Bandidos
The Chef’s attempt to cook a lobster is ambushed by a gang of pistol-wielding moustachioed lobsters wearing sombreros and muttering in a quasi-Mexican dialect. They manage to free the victim from the pot, and intimidate the Chef by shooting the cleaver out of his hand.
Lobster-Bandidos
The Chef’s attempt to cook a lobster is ambushed by a gang of pistol-wielding moustachioed lobsters wearing sombreros and muttering in a quasi-Mexican dialect. They manage to free the victim from the pot, and intimidate the Chef by shooting the cleaver out of his hand.
I remember watching that episode when it was first on. I think I was 5. Or 6.
Hey, there is a real USS Doyle.
97–Actually, yes. All winter, I had Niehaus growling, “Here comes big Sexy!” stuck in my head. It was deeply upsetting.
Willie Bloomquist for Manager!
This game post brought to you by the letter 9 and the number K.
The banditos sketch is on YouTube!!!
http://youtube.com/watch?v=lu9A0LlLyvo
I love YouTube!!!
Sadly, that’s one of the best-written Wikipedia entries I’ve ever seen. I don’t like the unnecessary Oxford comma in the last sentence, but other than that, it’s not too bad.
Niehaus = Forgetful Jones
And here is that Swedish Chef skit. (Move fast, YouTube is shutting down at 8.)
OH SNAP I BEAT YOU TOO IT
Who’s Jones? You must mean “Forgetful Willy”.
Don’t be dissing Forgetful Jones.
Hope this is suggestive to somebody somewhere:
Grover tells what an “exit” is: http://youtube.com/watch?v=FcnejoRTYsw
Ooooooooooooh Kenji Kenji Kenji
You really need to get a job. Or a hobby. Or a life. Or a bottle of Laphroaig. Or a combination of the four.
BORK BORK BORK
Who?
Did Ichiro steal that play from Willie? The Gameday out-indicating dot shows up right on top of Willie’s name.
Are you?
And of course ussmariner.com = Statler & Waldorf
Wow. This Angel announcer is an idiot. And he sounds like Dave Valle.
116 is hilarious.
Jamie: “I wanted to throw a meatball.”
Translator: “ç§ã¯ãƒŸãƒ¼ãƒˆãƒœãƒ¼ãƒ«ã‚’投ã’ãŸã„ã¨æ€ã£ãŸã€‚”
Kenji (under breath): “Baka…”
I always wonder who are the others in Hendu’s “we.”
We always say…
We call that a…
etc
126: “We” is Hendu and Snuffleupagus
What do we gotta do? Jojima hit that ball on the screws. =(
sigh
I noticed that Morse was called up. Did we also call up Doyle as well?
Slow as molasses Garret Anderson gets a triple after lining a ball to left field.
sigh…
Morse has been here.
Has anybody noticed that while Beltre’s average and OBP has flattened out (at distressingly low values) his SLG has been quietly but steadily rising all season?
Phyz and Hud = two old guys in balcony
I wonder what is going through Hargrove’s mind.
“Should I have the chicken and rice, or the lamb and rice?”
No word on Doyle?
“Phyz and Hud = two old guys in balcony”
Statler and Waldorf deserve better then that. Those two were the only reason I watched The Muppet Show.
Word on Doyle from the MLB.com notebook
“At the very least, Chris will be a left-handed bat off the bench and give one of our corner guys [left fielder Raul Ibanez, right fielder Ichiro Suzuki] a day [off],” Hargrove said. “We’ll see. I don’t anticipate him playing a ton. But we certainly want to utilize his bat when we can.”
it always seems like the mariners only have warning track power
Snelling and O’Flaherty called up, Sexson off BL
Dobbs, Morse, Green to T-Town.
Has anybody noticed that while Beltre’s average and OBP has flattened out (at distressingly low values) his SLG has been quietly but steadily rising all season?
Beltre’s probably just not the same now that Carl isn’t around to lift his spirits. AB’s probably just swinging from his heels trying to make up for all those HRs they’re missing with Carl out of the lineup.
when isn’t beltre swinging from his heels? as near as i can tell thats the problem
WILLIE TIME
i think you need serious mental help
“We’ll see. I don’t anticipate him playing a ton. But we certainly want to utilize his bat when we can.â€
I hope the Ms bench is comfy. Doyle will be sitting there a while.
Is it bad I’d rather see Willie dancing around then a bunch of Sonic dancer wannabes?
They’re in the same category of bad
Is it bad I’d rather see Willie dancing around then a bunch of Sonic dancer wannabes?
Depends. Do you like Dick’s?
Has there been a Willie bobblehead? I kind of imagine it more like one of those dashboard hula dancers.
Bucky was the cookie monster.
Lopez trying to sucker Figgins into running for third… that’s a nice play if it works.
148 – No, I am straight as an arrow.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wee_Willie_Bloomquist
Ah, boredom.
…although [Willie] has played every position except catcher during his major league career.
What’s the deal? I thought Willie would do anything to help the team, but apparently he’s too pansy to don the tools of ignorance.
can’t catch a break
todaythis month.I just turned on the game as Beltre was at bat and have already heard the announcers say “GA” approximately 48 times.
He hasn’t pitched, either
Lopez has some absurdly short strides when he runs.
Why is are two-out r(s)bi only considered clutch? Would Rizzs have considered an Ibanez one-out base hit clutch?
157 — Yabba Dabba Doo!!
Kelvim Escobar looking for a clutch out.
I think this is the first time I’ve ever tuned into mlb.tv and WISHED I was listening to the Mariners feed. For the love of God, Rex Hudler sounds like a stoner surfer…
…and then I find this link when I go to his wiki page. Fitting.
This trend at least gives me some hope that Sexson might put up halfway decent numbers next year.
Back to the Muppets, Rizzs has to be Wayne (of Wayne and Wanda).
Oh, without a doubt.
Is it sad that I’m watching the episode of The Office where Michael burns his foot on the Foreman grill instead of the continuing debacle?
165 — No. That’s a good one.
Clutch GIDP
Good thing that Doyle was not used. Better save him for later.
Screw you, Bloomquist.
Screw you more, Hargrove.
Fire him already, will you, Bill? Jesus Christ.
That was a scrappy non-RBI!
Grover has caught the same disease that Melvin did late in the ‘04 season: Bloomquistitis.
LOOK AT THE IGNITOR IGNITE!
So, baseball is supposed to be a zero sum game. There is no win win in baseball.
The M’s dugout appears happy on TV because a run crossed the plate, but the Angels have to be happy to get two outs. How can both teams be happy in a zero sum game?
The M’s were actually happy they were two outs closer to the buffet.
One side is stupid.
There is really only one use for Bloomquist left — to be the designated Guy Who Attacks The A’s Pitcher when they’re in town in September.
funny, my first thought when Bloomquist turned his back was that the ball was going to drop and we were in store for a comedy of errors
Have him pitch and throw at a batter. Maybe he can get a quality Angel suspended along with himself. Now that is a win win situation!
Clutch fielding there by Ibanez
You can’t stop Joan Figgins; you can only try to contain him.
Do you think Rizzs really said that stuff to O’Flaherty? Or, more likely, is he just making it all up?
Is it bad that I care more about my fantasy baseball team than I do the Mariners at this point? Come on Figgins, I needed that HR!
You doubt that Rizzs would do it?
I do not doubt it.
remember that mustache Bobby Valentine donned when he he’d been tossed from the Mets game years ago? Think if Jam’e wore that when pitching he could fool the guys into giving him some run support?
#181– Frank Hughes sitting in for Groz the other day actually said “Shone” Figgins, and was incredulous when corrected by the booth that it was “Shawn”
and apparently I am very glad about now that I haven’t been listening to Rizzs.
Damn, oh so close!!
Perhaps Mr. Figgins and Jhonny Peralta could split the cost of spelling lessons in the off-season.
185 — I heard that too. How is it that someone who gets paid to pay attention to sports can get away with that still? Or better yet, why can’t I be paid to pay attention to sports? I’ll take my answers off the air…
How funny would that have been to actually hear Rizzs get nailed by that foul ball, oh the string of F-bombs that would have ensued..
So much for the unearned run string and the game.
Lowe’s first earned runs if I am correct. Too bad it had to happen in that spot.
Well… we knew Mark Lowe was going to give up a run eventually.
Why not Mateo? Is he hurt or something?
#194
Grover probably didn’t go to Mateo because he figured with 2 outs he didn’t need a ground ball out.
Looks like this team needs some panic moves. New fielding lineup:
1B — Rivera (catching duties holding his bat back)
2B — Johjima (if Pudge can do it…)
SS — Beltre (plays there when they do the lefty shift anyway)
3B — Lopez (played there in the ASG, and that counted!)
RF — Doyle (dare opponents to test his arm)
CF — Betancourt (better SS than Willie means better CF than Willie, right?)
LF — Jones (finally not blocked by Willie)
C — Bloomquist (gets the maximum number of ‘touches’ this way)
DH — Benuardo (I ran out of panic moves)
Oh God, Rizzs is waxing poetic about 1995 again.
And now he’s going off on 1993.
Thank goodness for the 3rd out.
And the band played on…
Last stop before the DL for Mr. Soriano?
#185 inspired my new handle.
Fastball topping out at 91-92. Just put him on the DL for the rest of the year already.
what’s the point in keeping him up? it’s not as though they need him to pull a Radke.
This reminds me of the last time Soriano was injured/not injured/injured/not injured, with disastrous results.
And he strikes out the side, completely blinding the organization to any chance that maybe, just maybe, there might be something wrong.
204, I think you can replace “Soriano” with any random Ms pitcher.
Another Sexson hit in a meaningless situation. What’s his average when he’s hitting in a 1 run, 2 run, or tied ball game?
I don’t know. Why don’t you look it up and report back. Thanks!
gee. if only they’d scrounged up two runs a little earlier.
Probably about .230
And like magic, the save rule ensures an appearance by K-Rod. Looks like the Angels don’t really need Mike Scioscia on the bench to change pitchers: the save rule does it!
We might have seen Mateo!
The blonde with the glasses was kinda cute.
DOYLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEE
!!!!! DOYLE !!!!!
DOYLE!
I wonder if the See Clearly method that requires no drugs & no surgery to improve your vision is next door to Schick Shadel and its unique medical treatment which helps patients maintain healthy, productive lifestyles, free of the craving for alcohol or drugs….
D – O – Y – L – E
Why, just thinking about that makes me thirsty. I think I’ll have a beer.
Doyle, not up there hacking… woo-hoo!
(and then he swings through an inside pitch)
Wow. The M’s have really plunged off a cliff face the past ten days or so. I kind of assumed they’d keep playing .550 ball after their lousy 20/30 start. Guess June was the abberation.
If the Dodgers can win 10 straight, why the M’s? Only now even that won’t help.
GO!!!!!
DOYLE!!!!!
Who are you, Mariners manager, and what have you done with Mike Hargrove????
Pinch-hitting FOR BLOOMQUIST?????
WHAAAAAAA???
Who cares if he struck out? Fucking Bloomquist hits into a DP on this at-bat.
Doyle may have struck out, but he still advanced the runners. That’s true grit right there.
Why the ____ did you stop Ichi? Not that it mattered.
The Robotic Angie Mentink. “Someone press the ‘Jamie Moyer doesn’t get run support’ button!”
(Willie) Ballgame.
I think I can sum this thread up pretty succinctly with this file. (Please be tolerant if this doesn’t work. It’s my first attempt at posting a link and I’m doing it from a Motel 8 in Fargo ND…)
Ichiro seems to have lost his exclamation point over the last couple of weeks.
well, we all have, really.
Ichiro?
You gotta wonder about these guys.
228 — inspired!
ok, so tomorrow? Jared Weaver goes down.
(Please be tolerant if this doesn’t work. It’s my first attempt at posting a link and I’m doing it from a Motel 8 in Fargo ND…)
I hear the buffet at the Radisson is very reasonable.
So are truck stops, but that doesn’t make them palatable. But thanks for the tip…. I think.
So are truck stops, but that doesn’t make them palatable. But thanks for the tip…. I think.
Sorry, that was a “Fargo” reference.
Got it. Sorry. One of these days I’m gonna have to get around to seeing that flick.
Kruger kind of piddled on Angie’s ‘no run support’ comment, earning a snort (or something like that) from her off camera in the process. However, taking the focus off the Mariners lack of offense to spend 30 seconds of air time minutely dissecting a non-productive steal….Well, Bill, call me a sucker for blondes with long fingers but she was closer to getting the story of this game (and this week and this month) than you were by good long hook-slide.
Sigh. If I’d skipped the end of the game I could be watching some motherfucking snakes on a motherfucking plane right now.
You been watching Samuel L. Jackson on TDS again. I can tell.
Blow sez that baseball is a game of confidence and that probably there is not a lot of confidence on that team these days.
Glasgow says play Adam Jones. He doesn’t care if he struggles, you already know what you have in Bloomquist, let’s see what you have in Jones. Blow says yeah it’s ok to give him a day off now and then against a top line pitcher, but ….
He also mentioned that a lot of managers feel that if they are playing a team with a chance for the post-season, they have to play their veterans out of respect for the other team, whose manager will expect them to play their veterans. He thinks that if that is part of what Hargrove is doing with Jones, baseball culture has to change, because these days there are way too many teams who have a shot to go to the post season anymore (such as just about everyone the Ms play from here out…)
a lot of managers feel that if they are playing a team with a chance for the post-season, they have to play their veterans out of respect for the other team
Yeah, well until a share of their post-season media, concession and gate money starts showing up in Seattle, they can b**w us.
If the M’s are worried about paying Hargrove not to manage, well… the joke’s on them. Fire his sorry ass, already. I beg of you.
I voulenteer to be his replacement. I would be budget friendly. I will work for $125 a day, after taxes, plus expenses. My experence includes “Being The Person Who Would Be The Night Manger At Work If Only He Wanted To Work The Shitty Hours” and also, I’m pretty sure that I could beat Hargrove in a game of Strat-o-matic.
I could entertain the fans by saying pre-scripted, outrageous things to the press. Finny? That guy’s a… well… you get the idea, it would really puch up FSN Live. In closing, Me for manager. Bill? Chuck? Howie? Anybody?
By the way, this is the most entertaining game thread I have seen.
Alright, I know no one cares but me. But this early post is SLANDER! “Hooligan” said:
“In my case, small sample size can be misleading. When you examine my peripheral writing, as well as keyboard-adjusted error quotients, it is probably more likely that my career average will end up somewhere in the 90-94% range, putting me well above Corco, Lauren, and Argh!…”
Since when have I been wandering around making grammatical errors? I could out-grammar half you motherfuckers with my eyes closed and both arms tied behind my back. I curse, ok? And I don’t contribute anything meaningful to statistical discussions. But bad grammar and spelling cannot be pinned on me.
Step off lest my Smith & Wesson has to answer.
Step off lest my Smith & Wesson has to answer.
It’s ok Lauren, point the gun at me. I care about you, your grammar rocks. We’re going to be like three little Fonzies. And what’s Fonzie like?…
We’re going to be like three little Fonzies
That is a simile. I’m ahead….eats, shoots, and leaves
Whats one good reason to watch this team? Seriously, aren’t u guys tired of this catostrophe.
wILLIE COULD BE BOTH ROTATION AND RELIEVER AND THROW FASTER THAN ZUMAYA ZUMAYA SUCKS!!!
Wow, where is the world getting to
Hargrove and M’s have the capability to bring ‘this’ out of DMZ, no wonder. I think everyone here needs to take a couple of days of genuine break.
I could out-grammar half you motherfuckers with my eyes closed and both arms tied behind my back.
If I didn’t want to live to see my next birthday, I might be tempted to point out that it possibly should be “half OF you motherfuckers…”
But I do, so I won’t.
Since when have I been wandering around making grammatical errors?
Yeah, I thought that you were a weird inclusion on that list. I also thought it was funny that Dave was included on the list of grammar ‘greats’ since he’s admitted in the past that he’s not as strong in grammar and spelling as Derek, for instance.
Sigh. Why do I miss all the good threads?
marbledog: good thing you didn’t point that out. I might have then had to cite The Columbia Guide to Standard American English, which in its entry for half uses this
example of subject-verb agreement:
“Half the membership seems satisfied, but I’m afraid half [of] the members are not.”
Most importantly, of course, it fits the dialect. I’m a big fan of colloquial grammar when it suits my purposes.
Wow. I didn’t actually know that. I learn nearly everything I know by not pointing things out.
Good thing half them motherfuckers don’t got no good grammar, eh?
Wow, after seeing the box score and reading this night’s thread, my decision to see the 10 PM show at Cinerama of motherfuckin snakes on a motherfuckin plane was all good. Excellent flick, highly recommended assuming you get the joke
Mariners now looking at the #8 pick in the draft, 1.5 games out of #7, but only a game ahead of #12. Must I beg for draft pick odds? I mean, it’s not like there aren’t ghoulish posts here already. There are two on how bad the Mariners have been against the AL West.
An explanation why Adam Jones may be riding the bench:
Adam Jones benched
Apparently he committed an error in Texas and has been benched since. If that is the case Mike Hargrove should be shot….out of a cannon.
Bob Melvin and Mike could never be friends because Bob hates clowns and Mike is one big ass clown.
Hmm, Va Beach….at least in the past when the Mariners were losing you could always see how the Norfolk Tides were doing, but they are pretty bad too just not as bad as the M’s. I think MILB should have interleauge play between the IL and PCL. I would love to see the Tacoma Rainiers come to Norfolk for a series, I would cheer them on. Just an idea…costly in transportation though.
#255– the postgame explanation wasn’t that he was ‘benched’, but that he was doing so much lengthy pre-game work on his defense that he wasn’t being played on thise days. FWIW, Drayer says that he isn’t fazed by not playing, but intent on getting better.
Thank you, DMZ, for actually making me happy that the M’s are now out of the division race. BEST TOPIC STARTER EVAR.
“…local discount” (See # 6) – Schmidt at a local discount? Get real.
Despite the Emmett Watson enticements, that travel!
We’re not going to get him at local discount. Hazard pay is more likely.
I would love some interleague MiLB. Then I could see my Rochester Red Wings!
oh wait, I did see them. They’re called the “Minnesota Twins” this year.
Hey, despited all the bad stuff going on…I was glad my family moved to WA from 1984-1986…had we stayed in VA I would have never gone to a MLB game or would have probably been an Orioles fan or at worse a Yankees fan since my grandfather likes them. Luckily, I caught my first MLB game at the Kingdome in 1985..making me a fan and never expecting much more than a last place finish…so yeah we are used to this.
They only sell Braves, Yankees, Red Sox, Cubs, and Orioles gear in the local stores here. Most of the Nationals stuff has been moved to places like TJ Maxx, Marshall’s, and Ross..discount stores. M’s stuff is os rare, I’ll buy it instantly.
Anyways…about MiLB..the Mariners once had a connection here when there Rookie Single-A team was the Peninsula Pilots..they played one year and were moved to Delaware I think under a different organization. I wonder if any of those players ever made the MLB..this would be about 1990-91.
Nevermind found my answer:
“The last professional franchise to call War Memorial home was the Seattle Mariners, who brought back the Peninsula Pilots name from 1990-1992. Fans saw the likes of Bret Boone, Darren Bragg and minor league home run king Bubba Smith during the three years that Seattle’s Class A team was in Hampton. They moved the franchise to a newly constructed stadium in Wilmington, Delaware after they won the Carolina League here in 1992.”