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Felix Day woooo Felix Day!
Do I even need to write anything here? Really?
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109 Responses to “Felix Day woooo Felix Day!”
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Twittah
Woo Hoo! I say complete game SHUTOUT!!!!
Though I’d rather have Felix day this Friday, Saturday, or Sunday down here in S. Cal, I do love Felix day.
Doyle home run + Felix day = Happy morning.
Yes, yes you need to write something there.
Maybe a Haiku?
Felix on the mound
Baseball gods call no hitter
Surprised? I’m not.
Or maybe a limerick?
#4, you forgot a syllable in the last line, but touching nonetheless.
There was a young man from Caracas
Okay, take it from there.
I still can’t believe Bedard is on the DL. What a disaster.
Two in a row. Nice to think that’s a probable outcome.
If I designed a Felix day shirt, how would I be able to share it? I’m not really gifted in the interwebs, and don’t have a site. Is that cafepress free to upload or something?
There’s a pretty good Felix Day shirt available at the Lookout Landing store.
Alright, I skimmed through the USSM-is-5-years-old post and now I’m feeling guilty because I don’t really contribute substantive comments AND I’ve never donated any money, even. Put up a frickin’ beer button already and I’ll click it.
7
Negativity on Felix day shall be strictly forbidden.
There was a young man from Caracas
Who’s way cooler than Michael Dukakis
His K rates are down,
(He gets outs on the ground!!!)
But his filthiness makes Safeco raucous
and yes, I realize I cheated using raucous to rhyme with Caracas. But find words that rhyme with Caracas besides Isopachous…
12
lol … I guess this is a happy day.
I think the bigger news here is that Jeff Smulyan is filing a lawsuit in Seattle next week in an effort to get the Mariners back.
#7 wrote:
Yeah, same here. It’s shocking since he’s never been injured before. I guess the writers here at USSM are going to be changing their predictions of the Mariners running away with the division…
Lauren,
Don’t feel bad, I think there’s only 5-10 people who regularly post substantive comments. I don’t, and I know it. I should probably never post on anything but a game thread.
Except Lauren does contribute substantive comments. Otherwise I probably wouldn’t remember who she was.
Well, by “substantive” I really meant “contributing to statistical discussions and/or analysis.” It’s true that I normally contribute highly substantive profanity.
abender: an excellent effort! Why not just use “fracas” in the final line instead?
I heard…that Hugo Chavez has filed a lawsuit in court to get Felix back and make him a state controlled commodity.
RE:21
Spanky, Hugo and the country is owned by Felix. He IS the state.
Apparently the space and number of lines devoted to Philadelphia players is getting larger.
Be careful or there will be an in detail write-up on how Gillick still has an effect on how bad this team is…
There once was a King from Caracas
(don’t confuse with one called Barack-as)
His pitches…hot as hell
batters rung like a bell
Facing Felix, their pants they’d fill with cacas
Lauren came up with The Box, that was definitely substantive. Of course Bavasi has since made nicknaming AJ irrelevant, but it was great at the time.
I’ll be there tonight! 4th row behind 1st base.
Just to dig the knife a little bit. But, I’m actually visitting a friend here in SF and we are going to the game, against Blanton too. Should be great!
Huh, I forgot that. What was my rationale?
I don’t remember, but I’d guess it probably involved the way he fills out his uniform.
Felix Day is like Christmas, except instead of once a year, it happens every 5th day during the baseball season.
Felix day and Raul is now a National Media Officially Recognized “Professional Hitter”
IT WAS NOT EITHER, joser. You hush.
Hmm, site archive turns up nothing. Oh well.
Mentioning Dukakis? In an election year? I’m afraid you’re going to have to report that limerick as a contribution to the McCain campaign.
But, I’m actually visitting a friend here in SF and we are going to the game, against Blanton too. Should be great!
Ugh, we’re facing Blanton? Blanton seems to make the M’s look terrible all out of proportion to his actually talent. Hopefully our new-found patience at the plate will improve things, so that Felix doesn’t need to throw a no-hitter. Of course, it would be nice if he did anyway…
There once was a King from Caracas.
who had the shoulders of Atlas.
He carried a pedestrian lineup
and delayed the onset of bullpen blowup
by gyrating his pitches and then blowing ‘em away with gas.
ooooh I love poetry…
All hail the Kid from Cacacas
He pitches with stones the size of maracas
Rejoice! It’s his day,
the next if 4 games away
Somebody exile management to the Caucus.
Go M’s!
I hate to say it, 25 and 35, but you’ve no concept of rhythm in poetry. Thanks for playing.
but 36… well played.
jspektor,
Last night on Baseball Tonight after AJ homered the host was talking about how the O’s looked like geniuses because of the trade now.
Small sample size, but it still hurt to hear.
Man sorry about all those typos! That’s what I get for trying to type and post without my boss knowing what I’m doing instead of listenting to him ramble….
Normally my typos are beer related and this season hasn’t reached that point…(won’t say it as it is Felix Day)
I think the nickname THE BOX came from Jones having all the tools to be a good ballplayer. Toolbox, you know.
Blanton? Ok, who protects Ichiro from the Mr Stay-Puft this year? Seems like Cairo is expendable.
Lauren, grasshopper, you must practice your google-fu. You explain yourself here (and are quite insistent about it).
All hail the young King from Caracas.
His eminence never should shock us.
When he mixes his pitches
He leaves batters in twitches
And our cheers can be heard in Secaucus.
There was a poster named abendertwenty
who hated bad off-hand poetry
he blasted them all
and then had the gall
to be superior prosaically
(He’s right, though. It’s got to scan, or it doesn’t work.)
Lauren- It was because he had so many tools right? I can’t believe I remember that that. I spend a lot of time here.
A Valencian monarch named Felix
Has an extra-high-powered double helix.
Hitters flail at his flings
And their once-mighty swings
Are reduced to limp, impotent wee licks.
Should we have a poetry blog here? I submit a haiku (mostly because I wasn’t coming up with a good rhyme for Caracas):
Caracas mojo
Rubber arm leaves us breathless
No-no a given
I think the bigger news here is that Jeff Smulyan is filing a lawsuit in Seattle next week in an effort to get the Mariners back.
Hmmm. I guess there could be some upside to that — Howard and Chuck would likely get the boot. And Tampa has its franchise.
Ken Behring better not file to get the Seahawks back!
39 –
yeah man, I really can’t believe everything that has gone down with this deal.
Was there foul play involved? Was Angelos withholding something from the M’s? Did we receive damaged goods in the first place?
This is literally almost as bad as the Kevin Brown dodger nightmare (if he stays on the DL with a mysterious ‘hip inflammation’) except the dodgers didn’t give up everyone plus AJ.
I have a real bad feeling about this … and really am disappointed in Bavasi … yet again.
USSM … any response?
The box just reminds me of Dick in a Box. Which I don’t want to connote with AJ.
Scraps is on fire right now. I guess he’s trying to challenge Ibanez for Player of the Week.
Crappity crap! Thanks joser. But vj gets special points for remembering apparently on his/her own. Hurrah!
Nicely done on the scansion, scraps. But how about this:
There once was a young Venezuelan
Who cheered fans of a team that was failin’
His powerful pitches
Made batters his bitches*
And their efforts were all unavailin’.
*I don’t really approve of denigration by comparing men to women, but I claim poetic license.
50 – I was against the trade from the start, as were the USSM writers, as you can see from going back and looking at posts concerning the trade. However, Bedard getting injured doesn’t make it a worse deal. There’s no way to predict him having hip problems, since, as far as I know, he has no history of them and there’s no reason the M’s management should have anticipated that before the trade. If AJ and Sherril got injured tomorrow, we wouldn’t (or shouldn’t) be on this blog talking about how that shows it was a good deal after all. To quote a famous (to me) USSM post:
It was a bad trade because we gave up so many guys, because AJ is amazing, because it hurts our bullpen, because we only get 2 years of Bedard, etc. but not because of this injury. That’s just icing on the cake. Which probably makes it even worse.
Nice! I had given up on rhymes for “Venezuela”, and “Venezuelan” didn’t occur to me.
Some folks who were around in the old Mike Thompson P-I blog days might remember my ‘affinity’ for using the haiku/senryu, so, time to dig out those skills…
All Hail King Felix
The Pride of Venezuela
Day of Dominion!
Joe Blanton pitches against Felix tonight. I hope Cairo can kick some ass.
I have a poem to add
After 8 innings of brilliantly pitched ball
John McLaren was left with the call:
To stick with my ace? or replace with a vase?
He clearly put in EOF.
sorry I cant rhyme. long live king felix.
Cairo’s too big to serve in the Jason Ellison stand-up-against-ridiculous-odds role. Maybe Corcoran can sprint in from the ‘pen.
Felix is known as El Rey
And pitches on every fifth day
With no trips to the list
He’ll keep pumping his fist
After each and every big K
54 – I remember during this whole trade debate the one negative to Bedard was that he never has reached 200 innings in his career
137 IP – ’04
141 IP – ’05
197 IP – ’06
182 IP – ’07
At this point I just want him to get me any innings … but to say that he wasn’t injury prone just is not true.
Of course, we didn’t go after Vlad the Impaler for the same reasons … we also traded Randy b/c of his ailing back …
I guess hindsight is 20/20 but we knew Bedard has never pitched a whole season.
As long as we are still dropping poems…
He fools big league batters with uncommon ease
Think you can hit Felix’s slider? Bitch, please!
The changeup is coming, your bat’s way too quick
Can the Athletics hit him? Not even a lick!
The King’s wicked curve just explodes from his hand
Watch batters duck heads like an ostrich in sand
Despite his 4 seamer (which lights up the gun)
The 2 seamer draws more groundouts, inning done.
The lower the pitch count the better the King
A Crown sure is nice although how ’bout a ring?
For USSM fans who feel more alive,
On Felix Day, by far the best one in five.
abender, you’re spittin’ it big time! Nice job.
What, no iambic pentameter?
In truth, fair Hernandez, we are too fond.
It’s Felix Day, not Bedard Day, guys.
Suffice it to say that, barring real evidence of foul play (or should that be fowl play?) on the Orioles’ part, your opinion of the Bedard trade shouldn’t be any different today than it was the day the trade was made.
Jeff -
you are right the King is on the bump – can we switch his name to el gato? or is that strictly reserved for Felix Fermin?
Anyways back to Bedard one last time … My opinion of the trade was: I love Bedard and it was a great move to pick up someone of that talent for our team (even if we gave up some of the farm) — but my ONE hesitation was his inability to play a full season – or even get close. I guess he is proving me right.
I just wish they were not so ambiguous with his injury.
Long time lurker, had to join the bad limerick Felix Fest:
All hail to the King from Caracas
The skeptics have no right to mock us
Don’t put down our meter
Cuz just like his heater,
Our verses defy. You can’t clock us.
66 – I agree; I guess I thought you were saying that the implications of Bedard’s injury were somehow going back in time and changing the validity of the management’s decision to trade for Bedard.
People did say that his injury-prone-ness was concerning but not as much as if they had been arm injuries or injuries to the same part of the body. Hopefully the hip problem is just another in this string and won’t keep him out too long. Even in injury years his production (when he’s made it to the mound) has been pretty awesome.
Anyway, I know I should forget about all this because it will take my attention away from Felix. And Felix deserves all of my attention. I’m so excited.
FELIX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Felix will have at least 8k’s tonight!
I can’t believe nobody liked my pun.
Nicely done, stonyhill.
The pun is confusing because Orioles aren’t technically fowls. Unless you have an oriole egg farm somewhere…If they were the Baltimore Geese it would be better. A for effort though.
I had to do the best I could with what I had to work with!
Now, if he’d been traded from the Toledo Mud Hens…
That’s ok, Jeff. It was still pretty funny.
Let’s hope Felix gets his CG/SHO that he was supposed to get in Baltimore…if not only for my fantasy team, which is tanking. I place the blame solely on Prince Fielder’s now significantly narrower shoulders.
To the tune of O Christmas Tree
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
The joy you bring is endless
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
The joy you bring is endless
The one fine day we won’t be beat
You make them swing out of their cleats
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
The joy you bring is endless
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Our favorite day of the week
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Our favorite day of the week
Mow through the Sox at Fenway Park
It looks like their eyes are dark
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Our favorite day of any week
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
You make our summers happy
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
You make our summers happy
Your curveball drops into the zone
The batter feels so alone
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
You make our summers happy
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Where would we be without you
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Where would we be without you
Smiles come while on losing streak
You take the hill, it’s never bleak
O Felix Day! O Felix Day!
Where would we be without you
Why are you guys talking about Bedard when the greatest pitcher in the game is about to run down the hated Athletics?
Talk about off-topic!
HAPPY FELIX DAY!!!!!!!!!!!
LONG LIVE THE KING!!!!!!!!!!!!
abender20 you are a true poet!
Go M’s!
“Come inside with a surplus of velocity,”
Preach’d pitching coach Stottlemyre to the young king,
“And e’en if they can touch you still their hands will sting
On shards of bat, while no sight will be more pretty
Than picking out the weak-hit ball ‘mid the slivers.”
But Felix thought he should do more and rack up Ks
Hurling sliders as if facing many Beltres
While memories of last year’s hurt that brought shivers
Passed thro’ my mind once again as his pitch count climb’d.
Good fortune held, and hitters did little damage
Plus the defense held its own to his advantage
And his teammates had a handful of hits well-timed
Enough to win, should his relief be on the way
Alas, ’twill be no complete game for him today.
Anybody see this about Bedard
2 game win streak, here we come!
I have to apologize ahead of time, as reading limericks always sends my mind back a couple decades to juvenile jokes involving a man from Nantucket. A somewhat cleaner version, Felix-style…
There once was a man from Nantucket
When Felix pitches he steps in the bucket
A week grounder to short
And all the King’s court
Cheers loud while the man just says “___ it”.
80 – Great Link – that really goes in depth …
El GATO
I can’t worry about the Bedard trade yet, I’m still not over the Mitchell for Swift, Burba and Jackson.
Rock on Felix!
There once was a man from Nantucket
Unfortunately, no major league baseball player has ever been born in Nantucket.
Absolutely a great link on #80. But, that motion doesn’t seem all that different to me than 75% of the other pitchers out there.
from nantucket
Morrow’s up, Jimerson in the minors.
There once was a King form Caracas
Whose skill can always shock us
When he uses breaking balls
The other team falls
And Safeco gets very raucous
Not bad for an Econ/PoliSci guy who avoids English classes. If I may say so myself.
Sorry, trying to do 3 things at once. Info from Baker.
Ode to Felix
On an antique field two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand on an empty mound. Near them, in a batter’s box,
Half sunk a shattered helmet lies, which caption “A’s” and Whose tarred bill
Tell that its owner well the crotch-grab knew,
And Oh those pitches threw, the curve ball, the slider,
And the fast ball – up and in.
On the pedestal, these words appear:
“My name is Felix Hernandez, King of Kings:
Look on my record, ye Mighty, and despair!”
Nothing beside remains: Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare,
The dirt and unkempt grass stretch far away.
With apologies to Shelley
I did say born. In addition to Hunnefield, there’s a Tom Earley who died in Nantucket. I’d be curious to know if either of them had more of a connection than retiring there.
Is Morrow up because he fixed his velocity/location problems, or because his problems seem much less problematic after the last two weeks of bull pen performance?
Cairo The Enforcer! Sounds like an action hero from one of those low-budget MST3K sci-fi flicks!
There was a young man from Caracas
named Felix A.-something Hernandez
when he took the hill
the defense sat still
They’d just shout from the bench “no battas!”
Or how about a Haiku?
Springtime awaiting
The return of the King
Felix Hernandez
I just want a shirt that says simple
happy Felix day!
Another one
A king from Venezuela once said
why the he’ll aren’t you in bed?
you’ve got no chance
you might get a glance
cause I’m king felix, bitch!
oh, and love the poetry.
I was an English lit major, not composition, myself.
Morrow was ready to be called up in the same sense that Rhodes was.
Couldn’t they have not called up anyone since they need to activate JJ tomorrow anyways and just have to send someone back down?
Or, there’s the Tregedy At Camden Yards variation:
There was a young King from VZ
Who breezed thru eight innings run-free
But along came McLaren
His text book a starin’
And the bullpen coughed up a big three! >:(
*Tragedy
I hate to bring up the Bedard-to-DL topic again, but does anyone remember the Baltimore-writer-on-Baltimore-radio-station spawned rumor about Adam Jones having a degenerative hip condition that might nix the trade, and how puzzled we all were about where THAT came from?
Well, I believe someone was actually talking about Bedard, and it wasn’t very long before someone else garbled the rumor in repeating it. Naturally no one in the Mariners front office was paying any attention when all this was going on, and so the trade went ahead (can’t believe Bedard actually passed a physical, unless all they did was take blood and urine samples).
BTW — worse yet — the other day I read(can’t find where, now) that he had a similar problem in college (maybe, from what I read in Wikipedia, due to a 7 inch-30 pound growth spurt at age 17?), and now I read this from the AP report: “Bedard said he had hip inflammation in 2000 during his first full professional season in the Orioles’ minor leagues, but not again until he told the Mariners about the pain before his scheduled homecoming start at Baltimore on April 6.”
with apologies to Robert W. Service
There were strange things seen on that Sodo green
When the dome echo’d with roars
Teal blue pants and Piniella rants
And “Everybody scores!”
But since its demise and Safeco’s rise
We’ve seen wonder come to call
There was 2001 and games under the sun
And Ichiro climbing the wall
Yes we’ve seen great sights ‘neath Safeco lights
Countless fantastic plays
But one of the best could be tonight’s test
When Felix no hits the A’s.
There was a young man from Caracas,
whose fastballs screamed “Bet you can’t clock us!”
His curveballs would dive
and the park come alive
with the noise of a pair of maracas.
RE 104: I was thinking the exact same thing. I’m a journalist, so I always have to be careful about following rumors TOO far. But often they are worth following because they contain at least some element of truth. In this case, the hip injury or condition or whatever was true. It was just the player that was wrong. The fact that the M’s FO didn’t pursue this issue or chose to ignore it is an example of why we get so frustrated around here. I did something to my hip once by crossing my foot across my other leg above the knee (too too far). I only feel it after marathons or intense yoga classes. But if I were a major league pitcher, I imagine I would feel it a lot more often. The M’s knew all this and traded the farm for Bedard anyway.
fwiw, the hip rumor came from one person, Stan “the fan” Charles, (publisher of a sports weekly magazine in Baltimore) who was on a radio show in B’more during that long week after Adam talked about being traded, and suggested that Jones had “a degenerative hip condition” and that was causing the O’s to drag their feet.
No one else in B’more (or here) found any thing to back up either that story or to link it to Bedard — and it was looked into by the locals back there. Charles himself never wrote about it on his own website, paper or in his weekly column– in fact, he never even referred to his on-air remark or the uproar it caused …
I know, msb, just the fact that “Stan the Fan Charles” happened to pick THAT ailment out of the air makes me a little suspicious (I’m such a conspiracy theorist!) — so odd that neither he nor anyone else ever made a peep about such a condition until he blurted it out on that radio show.
Sorta like everybody back there was told to shut up until after the trade, only he didn’t get the memo, and got the story all screwed up, to boot.