The All-Mariner All-Worst
WoTYC, 3, John Morgan:
An All-Time Worst Team seems appropriate and ripe for comedy.
No problem. Worst Mariner team of all time:
DH: Jose Vidro
C: Kenji Johjima
1B: Richie Sexson
2B: Jose Lopez…
Yes it’s your 2008 Seattle Mariners!
The worst part about that — it’s not that far off. Say they finish at 100 losses. Their competition will be:
— the 1978 Darrell Johnson team (56-104)
— the 1980 Darrell Johnson/Maury Wills team (59-103)
— the 1983 Rene Lachemann-led team (60-102)
The Mariners started up in 1977. All of those seasons came within seven years of starting out at a time when expansion teams were totally amazingly screwed in their first years. The Blue Jays did a great job building out of expansion and weren’t hampered by terrible ownership, and it took them six years before they got over .500.
This is staggering: the Bavasi years have returned one of the richest franchises in baseball to a six-year run unequaled since the days when it began, hamstrung by a terrible starting position, no payroll, and inept management.
What’s a year-by-year lineup look like, then? Using the same standards as we’re using in the ongoing All-Mariner All-Time roster:
DH: You’ve got choices. For raw awfulness, Leroy Stanton, 1978: 342 PA, .182/.265/.248. For a little better, what about 1991 Alvin Davis: 528 PA, .221/.299/.336. Ow. Vidro’s a happy medium, with 330 PA .234/.274/.338. I have to take Leroy Stanton.
C: Miguel Olivo 2005. Just thinking about that makes me wince.
1B: Richie Sexson 2007. Awful defense and .205/295/.399
2B: Jose Lopez 2007. Blech defense and .252/.284/.355. You might want Harold Reynolds 1986, or does he get credit for his early-career defense?
SS: Mario Mendoz, 79. .198/.216/.249. Yeeaaaaaaaaaagh.
3B: I want Luis Sojo’s ill D and crappy hitting of 96 (.211/.244/.263), but for more playing time I’m fond of Spiezio 2004, or better yet, 1988 Jim Presley hard at work blocking Edgar Martinez.
LF: Mike Felder, 93. I was excited to have him come over, because I followed the Giants, but .209/.260/.267 in 376 PA. Wowww. For a left fielder.
CF: The forgotten John Moses, 1987: 433 PA, .246/.301/.331 and when was the last time you heard about his stellar glovework?
RF: Al Cowens 1983, 384 PA, .205/.255/.329, or John Hale, 1978, 251 PA, .171/.283/.265 ?
Bench: wooooww. Sojo 96, Fermin 95, uhhh… Olivo as catcher 2005, backing himself up. Outfield, I’ll take Mickey Brantley 89.
Now for the rotation, they have to have put in at least 150 IP as an arbitrary line, and I’m trying not to pick 2008 pitchers.
SP: Joel Pineiro, 2006
SP: Glen Abbott, 1978.
SP: Jim Beattie, 1980. Shudder.
SP: Ken Cloude, 1998.
SP: Bill Swift, 1998.
This is tough. I’m tempted to try and pull BABIP out, but then that’s… add DeLucia 1991 and drop Pineiro? Franklin 2005 over Abbott 1978, perhaps. This is a nausea-inducing rotation no matter what.
Byron McLaughlin 1980
Lee Gutterman 1986
Bobby Ayala 1998 (!!!)
Norm Charlton 1997
Mac Suzuki 1999
Edwin Nunez 1988
Update: And Maury Wills has to be the manager.
There’s a team that could go 40-122. Things could be worse. But there’s surprisingly little there.
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