We get letters

DMZ · September 19, 2009 at 11:05 am · Filed Under Mariners 

Donald Moran writes, in “I can’t take it anymore”

I read your guys blogs daily and I get pissed off more by the day. The post on the 18th of September by DMZ saying that by Ichiro hitting a walk off off of Rivera, that should change someones mind about wether or not Rivera should be a first ballot hall of famer or not is just plain stupid. He has been the most dominant closer in the AL for the last 10 years. I am a die hard Mariners fan but I am a baseball fan first and I can identify good baseball when I see it. You guys have your heads so far up Ichiro’s ass you can’t see the light of day. I would love a reply from you just to see what useless garbage you have to come back with.

You Suck!
Go Mariners!

Hi Donald!

Here’s what useless garbage I have to come back with: I was making fun of people who think Ichiro! can’t hit in “clutch” situations, pointing out that he just won a game hitting a home run off the pitcher considered clutchiest of clutch closers.

That’s all. No slight to Rivera intended, though I guess if you’re really looking for an argument you could read “flip” as “change from pro-Rivera to pro-Ichiro” which I could have made clearer at the expense of having a two-sentence quick post.

Yours sincerely,

Guy with his head so far up Ichiro’s ass I can’t see the light of day or maybe it’s just cloudy and raining in Seattle today.


31 Responses to “We get letters”

  1. IP on September 19th, 2009 11:16 am


  2. CCW on September 19th, 2009 11:20 am

    What a tool.

  3. Kunkoh on September 19th, 2009 11:26 am

    Seriously? Someone got all wound up over that? It’s like some people hate Ichiro so much they have to go looking for things to nitpick over, rather than just enjoying Captain Awesome’s laser rocket arm, or launching a rocket in the 9’th off of the best closer to play the game.

    I’m still giddy as a school girl over that hit last night!

  4. Sports on a Schtick on September 19th, 2009 11:40 am

    Nowhere near the “unethical” guy but I look forward to future editions of “Dear USSM.”

  5. Dirk on September 19th, 2009 11:43 am

    Wow… If it weren’t for the fact that it was email to you guys, I’d say Mr. Moran was doing his best troll impression. That being said, maybe he was just reaching out for attention…. Mission accomplished I guess.

    BTW, Donald, it’s exciting when two future Hall of Famers face each other, regardless of the outcome. Try and tone down your hate just a bit and get a massage or something. Trust me, you’ll feel better.

  6. JMK on September 19th, 2009 11:44 am

    Wow… Guess he wants a refund…

  7. Colm on September 19th, 2009 12:15 pm

    Gosh that’s a very intemperate letter, isn’t it?
    I reread DMZ’s post and still can’t see an intentional slight to Rivera.

    Donald Moran? Sounds Scots-Irish. That could explain the harsh forms of expression.

  8. G-Man on September 19th, 2009 12:29 pm

    Wow… Guess he wants a refund…

    Ha, yes. When I read something like this guy’s letter, I always think of how the fact that Dave, Derek and company are providing USSM for nada seems to escape some people.

    On a different subject, I never heard why the rotation was shifted so that Felix pitched last night instead of tonight. One rumor had it was because the ‘pen was gassed from extra innings Thursday.

  9. tgf on September 19th, 2009 12:47 pm

    Not sure how anyone reads that post as a shot at Rivera.

  10. Christopher Michael on September 19th, 2009 12:56 pm

    When I read the post in question, I almost replied that both ESPN and MLB network called them future Hall of Famers. So therefore Ichiro didn’t need the votes.

    Reading comprehension for the win.

  11. Mike Snow on September 19th, 2009 1:00 pm

    Not sure how anyone reads that post as a shot at Rivera.

    It’s possible, but it requires the inability to understand what the title of the post means.

  12. JerBear on September 19th, 2009 3:40 pm

    I just like how he starts his letter with (essentially):

    “I intentionally do something every day that makes me get angry!”

    Then totally misinterprets what you’re saying, hurls some insults, and ends with:

    “I hope you reply with something else I don’t agree with so I can get more angry!”


  13. pinball1973 on September 19th, 2009 4:04 pm

    Now, it could’ve been a bad Innertubes day for Mr. Moran. I myself have completely misread the (obvious to everyone else) intentions in a thread (on politics only, though) before and come out like Yosemite Sam – till corrected.
    Still, my anger had something more, what?, humorously stupid and wrong, whereas this one really goes for the “I’m a maroon asshole, in no uncertain terms!” style.

    Anyway, thanks for writin’!

  14. galaxieboi on September 19th, 2009 4:04 pm

    Reading comprehensionHuskies for the win.

    Fixed it for ya! Woooo!!!

  15. Librocrat on September 19th, 2009 4:11 pm

    At least he ended with the requisite “Go Mariners” that seems to follow all of these letters. Being forced to defend a joke as though it were truth is painful, but at least he capitalized properly. That’s always nice.

  16. Librocrat on September 19th, 2009 4:13 pm

    Also, is that really his name, or was that made up?

  17. Suikakujyu on September 19th, 2009 4:21 pm

    Even though it was foolish for Mr. Moran to write an email without thinking, you can’t deny that sometimes it’s hard to pick up DMZ and Dave’s tone of writing without being really familiar with all of their work.

    I recall a few people gave their agreeing condolences for that sarcastic Silva post awhile back.

  18. Gomez on September 19th, 2009 5:42 pm

    I’m surprised he didn’t P.S. it with “So what Ichiro have for lunch yesterday?”

    Part of me wishes We Get Letters would be a regular feature (I’m sure you get enough crazy e-mails to make it possible), but I wouldn’t want to encourage any more crazy e-mails than you already get.

  19. Bugeater on September 19th, 2009 5:47 pm

    Sounds like Donald needs to try De-caf!

  20. Chris_From_Bothell on September 19th, 2009 5:59 pm

    Reading is fundamental, Donald.

  21. msb on September 19th, 2009 6:23 pm


    I thought it was a conversion zone … it is Ichiro’s ass?

  22. thegroovewrangler on September 19th, 2009 6:24 pm

    I, too, consider sending you guys a letter from time to time. My letter would be to tell you that your posts have become an essential part of my day, and that without your insights, 2008 might have literally killed me. Please let me shove my head up your asses, sirs, so that Ichiro! can continue playing his breathtaking brand of baseball and not have me dragging him down on the basepaths, and so that I’ll be there to hear your each and every word right when you speak it. Thanks.

  23. dsmiley on September 19th, 2009 8:35 pm

    This would have never happened if Ichiro! hadn’t selfishly hit that walk-off homer.

    PS. I echo thegroovewrangler. You guys rock and would be first ballot Blog-Of-Famers if such a thing existed.

  24. Jack Howland on September 19th, 2009 9:32 pm

    I read your guys blogs daily and I get pissed off more by the day.

    I intentionally hit myself on the hand with a hammer daily. It hurts like Hell, and pisses me off more by the day.

    Hammers suck!

  25. justme on September 19th, 2009 9:40 pm

    I got my head up Jose Lopez’s ass. Ichiro’s ass is too crowded.

  26. skipj on September 20th, 2009 1:39 am

    Wow, funny comments, DMZ letting the rope loose for a self-hanging by Mr. Moran, who wants ice cream!

  27. Slurve on September 20th, 2009 12:24 pm

    Obviously this is a live execution to discourage hate mail and rebellion from our moderating overlords.

  28. terry on September 20th, 2009 2:41 pm

    Guy with his head so far up Ichiro’s ass I can’t see the light of day or maybe it’s just cloudy and raining in Seattle today.

    To be fair, either option is mutually exclusive…

  29. TranquilPsychosis on September 21st, 2009 9:29 am

    I got my head up Jose Lopez’s ass. Ichiro’s ass is too crowded.

    Judging by his defense, I always thought it was his own head up his ass.

  30. eponymous coward on September 21st, 2009 10:42 am

    Actually, Lopez’s defense is just fine– pretty close to his career numbers.

  31. TranquilPsychosis on September 21st, 2009 11:28 am

    Actually, Lopez’s defense is just fine- pretty close to his career numbers

    Can’t a fella just hate on Lopez without somebody bringing logic and common sense to the table? Geez!

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