July 15, 2003 · Filed Under Mariners · Comments Off on  

Jamie Moyer, welcome to your first all-star game. Please retire Jim Edmonds, Albert Pujols, and Barry Bonds.

Wow. Jamie, you’re the man. Now would you please walk on water?

Oh, and its time for a Felix Hernandez update. The Mariners didn’t want him going 6 days between starts, so they’ve flip-flopped him and Victor Ramirez in the rotation. Hernandez is now starting Wednesday night in Everett. If you’re available, go. Take a train. Ride a bike. Hitchhike. It isn’t like there is a major league game to watch. Get your tail to Everett Memorial Stadium and watch this kid pitch.

July 15, 2003 · Filed Under Mariners · Comments Off on  

Since it appears to be my day to provide content, I went ahead and updated the Big Board. Against my better judgement, I added the Peoria Mariners to the mix this time around. Please keep in mind that rookie ball is incredibly hard to follow — the lineup changes almost daily, players play a number of positions, players are coming and going quite often, and so on. That said, I felt it was important to include Peoria for a complete picture of the minor league system. I also made the font a bit smallar in order to fit all this new info in… I hope it’s still readable for you. As always, drop me a line if something doesn’t look right.

July 15, 2003 · Filed Under Mariners · Comments Off on  

Rickey Henderson is back in the big leagues after his stint in the Atlantic League. Go Rickey!

In addition to signing Henderson, the Dodgers also traded for Jeromy Burnitz. Burnitz, a lefty with good power, is one guy I was hoping the M’s would go after despite the fact that I should know better when it comes to such hopes.

July 15, 2003 · Filed Under Mariners · Comments Off on  

I’ve had some not-so-nice things to say about Bret Boone over the years, the number one thing being that I’ve called him the “Crap Machine” since April of 2001.

Get up! Get on up.

A get up! Get on up.

Stay on the scene…

…like a crap machine.

Despite the fact that he’s proven himself to be a very good hitter, I’ve continued to call him Crap Machine on the off chance that it’s my hard-hitting commentary which turned him into the hitter he is today. I know that’s silly, but believe me — as soon as you trust the Crap Machine, he’s going to let you down. In fact, I’ve been known to taunt him at the ballpark: “Heeeeeeeey! Hey! Craaaaaap Machiiiiiiiine… Try not to suck!” I kid because I care.

That aside, Bret Boone gets my vote for coolest comments from a Mariners player so far this year when he ripped Bud Selig a new one yesterday. Baseball hasn’t seen comments this good since Denny Hocking slammed Selig last year for disputing the financial claims made by Forbes magazine.

Way to go, Crap Machine!