Wednesday wonders
From the News Tribune: Gil Meche donated some baseballs to help a New Orleans college team, and Matt Thornton didn’t allow a run — and has a new pitch!
“I’m working on a new sinker, and I didn’t get my arm up to one hitter and walked him,†Thornton said. “Other than that, I threw pretty well.†…
Also in the TNT – “Vina wants to get quick hands on job”
Over in the PI, Meche is now throwing a two-seam fastball, instead of his four-seamer. And there’s a profile on Luis Gonzalez, a Rule 5 draftee who came here via trade and might make the bullpen.
The Seattle Times has Pineiro “getting ribbed” over his WBC participation. Also, Richie Sexson would like to remain healthy and productive.
New USSM Limited Edition T-shirts up
“Top Ten Reasons I’m Looking Forward to the 2006 Season”
(go buy it now)
1. Increased ticket prices mean I no longer must choose between charities vying for extra cash
2. Medically speaking, I have to wake up from this nightmare eventually
3. Placed huge pre-season bet on Oakland
4. After achieving Nirvana, both winning and losing are equally satisfying to me
5. WFB a no-hitter threat every game
6. They thought I was left handed, now I’m signed to a guaranteed 3-year, $22m deal
7. Recently suffered blunt force trauma to head, believe it’s 1996
8. Can pretend baseball is like golf, where low score wins
9. Low attendance means less competition for airgun-fired t-shirts
The tenth one varies depending on which version you want to fit your marital status:
Spouse version:
10. Spouse stops complaining about me, starts complaining about team
Singles version:
10. I’m sure to do better with fans of the opposite sex with this cool USSM-themed T-shirt
Now, we also came up with a whole bunch of top ten items that didn’t make it. If there’s massive public acclaim, we might be able to work something out for a second set or something that’ll accomodate you. They were:
11. 132 losses in two years left some hope uncrushed
12. Ballgirls no longer at risk of being hit on, if you know what I mean and unfortunately I think you do
13. Hang on, give me a second, I’m sure I can come up with ten reasons
14. Masochism
15. Three words: high draft pick
16. More empty seats means fewer complaints about my body odor
17. Heard captain goes down with ship, not a big fan of Tannille either
18. Was big fan of Extreme, heard their guitar player now M’s shortstop
19. Missed the joy of nurturing intestinal parasites contracted from stadium food
20. Can’t wait to see new cutting-edge goatee and soul patch fashions
21. Bandwagon fans should finally be weeded out
22. I bought counterfeit season tickets to see this counterfeit team… with counterfeit money!
23. I’m a member of the ownership group — suckers!
24. Want my enthusiasm for football rekindled
Anyway, be the coolest kid on your block.