With the Mariners coming back for a homestand, we need to review a few things.
Conduct for Being on the Real One Video Screen
- Realize you’re on the video screen, jump in seat
- With one arm, point at the video screen
- With free arm, hit the person next to you while yelling “look, look!”
- Wave towards the video screen
At no time should you spot and wave towards the camera that is filming you. Act as if it is the R1VS that is watching you directly.
Now you may be wondering “Derek, how do I get my mug on the Real One Video Screen at Safeco Field?”
Good Question.
Getting Your Mug on the R1VS
- For fans with life partners:
- Procreate or adopt an early-stage procreation of another human
- Evaluate early-stage human for cuteness: do people on the street stop and say “My, what an attractive and sympathic helpless toddler you have there” or something similar? If not, retreat a step and procreate again or adopt another early-stage procreation of others.
- Bring infant human to the game.
- Wait.
- During half-inning breaks, hold infant human up and bob child to the music.
- Sell child to newly interested infant human dealers and bank profit. Repeat as needed.
- For fans without life partners:
- Buy a set of 5 tickets or more.
- Find out where local high school girls hang out. (Hint: ask local waitresses for tips)
- Give all tickets but one to attractive local high school girls. Screen to select those with proclivities to show their bellies.
- Wait.
- During half-inning breaks as attractive local high school girls are put on camera, camera will pull back slightly to show larger section of the crowd, including you.
- Optional: While they bask in glow of stadium-wide attention from males, determine if any of them are of legal age in Washington and attempt to make them your life partners, so that you can produce cute progeny and continue to dominate the R1VS between innings.
Hope this helps!
Mariner pitchers with events as a percent of approximate batters faced (omits stuff that’s not in ESPN’s main pitching stats page, like HBP):
NAME abfp h% hr% bb% k%
Freddy Garcia 180 20% 4% 9% 14%
Ryan Franklin 173 23% 4% 8% 9%
Joel Pineiro 167 20% 2% 11% 13%
Jamie Moyer 156 22% 3% 10% 20%
Gil Meche 154 21% 3% 6% 21%
S. Hasegawa 70 17% 0% 7% 14%
G. Carrara 67 25% 3% 9% 10%
Julio Mateo 60 18% 3% 8% 22%
Arthur Rhodes 57 16% 0% 9% 21%
Jeff Nelson 47 26% 4% 4% 28%
K. Sasaki 45 31% 2% 9% 24%
R. Soriano 7 0% 0% 14% 43%
Team line is 21% hits, 3% HR, 9% BB, 16% K. Note that while Kazu turns up as being the superior pitcher in K/9, Nelson is clearly the better and more dominating of the two relievers.
Fun secondary stat for the day: I looked at the number of batters it takes each Mariner pitcher to record three outs. Low, obviously, is good. High was Kazu with 5, Carrara was 2nd at 4.7, followed by Pineiro, Moyer (4.4), Garcia..Meche was at 4.2, and Arthur Rhodes was the lowest of all at 4. I find that really interesting, because it means that to get through an inning, Kazu on average sees two batters get on base (or circle them at a lazy trot).
Minor League Highlights for Sunday, May 4
Tacoma was rained out in Iowa, and the two teams will play a double header today to make up the lost game. LHP Craig Anderson and RHP Scott Atchison are scheduled to start for the Rainiers.
San Antonio 10, Wichita 7. This is getting a bit ridiculous, don’t you think? One day after scoring 21 runs on 25 hits, the Missions pounded out 17 hits to win their 15th game in a row. 3B Jose Lopez (normally a middle infielder) and DH Chris Snelling (normally an outfielder) each had four hits in five trips including two doubles for Snelling, who drove in three runs and scored once. Lopez scored three times and is now hitting .333/.379/.482 — he could be in Seattle sooner than you think. 1B A.J. Zapp added three hits including his 9th homer of the year, tops in the Texas League. RHP Clint Nageotte was the beneficiary of this offensive outburst, going to 4-0 on the year despite not pitching well (5 2/3 IP, 4 H, 5 R, 3 ER, 4 BB, 4 K, 2 HR, 2 HBP). RHP Jared Hoerman (1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 0 K) picked up his 8th save of the season.
Inland Empire 6, Modesto 3. Double your pleasure, double your fun. The 66ers used seven doubles and a late rally — two runs in the 8th, one in the 9th — to pick up the win for RHP Emiliano Fruto (3 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 4 K), who appears to be thriving in his new relief role. CF Greg Jacobs, DH Richard Pohle and 3B Hunter Brown each had two hits, including two doubles for Pohle. Seven of the team’s ten hits were doubles. C Chris Collins, getting a rare start behind the dish, drove in two runs with his second double of the year. RHP Jared Thomas worked the first five (4 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 5 BB, 8 K) and RHP Mike Steele (1 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 0 K) was credited with his 7th save. In prospect news, RF Shin-soo Choo has cooled considerably since his hot streak upon being inserted into the leadoff spot in the batting order. The young Korean has slumped to .233/.327/.444 on the season.
Wisconsin 6, Dayton 2. Wisconsin got back in the win column Sunday after losing back-to-back games following their 8-game win streak behind the pitching of LHP Bobby Livingston (7 IP, 7 H, 2 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 2 K). RF T.J. Bohn homered and was one of four players — 3B Matt Hagen, LF David Delucchi, DH Christopher Phillips, Bohn — with two hits in the game. Hagen doubled and scored twice, while Delucchi doubled, scored and drove in two. RHP Renee Cortez (1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 1 K) and LHP Cesar Jimenez (1 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 1 K) each worked a perfect inning to close out the game, and now have ERAs on the season of 0.96 and 1.86, respectively.
Minor League Highlights for Saturday, May 3
Iowa 3, Tacoma 2. Iowa pitching held the Rainiers to just four hits, winning a one-run game for the second straight day. RHP Brian Sweeney (5 IP, 7 H, 3 R, 3 ER, 2 BB, 5 K) took the loss, though he still has a 1.91 ERA and 30:4 strikeout-to-walk ratio in 28 1/3 innings on the year. RHP Allan Simpson put together a solid relief outing (3 IP, 1 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 2 BB, 6 K) and C Pat Borders had two of Tacoma’s four hits, including a double.
San Antonio 21, Wichita 5. If this team were any hotter, they’d be in danger of spontaneously combusting. The Missions have now won a Texas League record 14 straight games, outscoring their opponents 104-41 during the streak. In yesterday’s 25-hit blowout win, all nine starters had at least two hits and all but one scored at least two runs. C Jim Horner led the way with five hits in six trips including a homer, raising his season average to a robust .475. Amazingly, 20 of their 25 hits were singles. LHP Bobby Madritsch didn’t pitch well (5 IP, 7 H, 5 R, 5 ER, 5 BB, 0 K), but picked up the win thanks to all that run support.
Modesto 6, Inland Empire 2. The 66ers were shut down at the plate once again, scoring just twice on seven hits. RHP Enmanuel Ulloa, recently sent down from San Antonio, got the start but couldn’t make it out of the 5th inning (4 1/3, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 0 BB, 5 K). Still, it wasn’t a bad start for a guy who has worked almost exclusively in relief the past two seasons. LHP Ryan Ketchner (2 2/3 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 1 BB, 4 K) took the loss in relief but added to his remarkable 37:4 K:BB ratio. Offensively, 1B John Castellano went 2-4, scored once and drove in a run. CF Greg Jacobs added a triple and a run scored.
Dayton 4, Wisconsin 3. The Timber Rattlers dropped their second straight following their eight-game winning streak, despite taking a 2-0 lead in the top of the 1st. Dayton tied it up in the sixth, then took a 3-2 lead in the 8th. Wisconsin answered with a run in the top of the 9th to tie, but RHP Bryan Heaston (1 1/3 IP, 2 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 0 K) allowed the winning run in the bottom half of the inning. 1B Jon Nelson led the offense with two hits including a solo homer in the 1st. The Timber Rattlers made four errors in the game, one of which led to Dayton’s tying run in the 6th.
On April 22nd, the U.S.S. Mariner crew met up for a ballgame at Safeco Field. Before and during the game, there was discussion about Mike Cameron’s future with the Mariners. It was agreed by all parties that he’d be nuts to re-sign here after the season, and the Mariners would be wise to spend their money on a player who could succeed in Safeco Field. The unanimous opinion was that both the Mariners and Cameron would be better off parting ways. It didn’t hurt that he was hitting .229/.313/.357 to that point. He then proceeded to win the game with a grand slam home run and has hit .429/.538/.714 since. Think he heard us?
Speaking of heating up, Jeff Cirillo is 6-12 on the road trip and has drawn 4 walks without a strikeout. However, 5 of those 6 hits are singles. Until he starts consistently hitting the ball with authority to the gaps, I’m going to have a hard time saying he’s back. Nevertheless, he’s not that bad of a player outside of Safeco Field, and the talk of using McLemore, Bloomquist, or Colbrunn at third base is nonsensical. The Mariners are 4th in defensive efficiency for a reason, and Jeff Cirillo is a huge part of that reason. There isn’t a player on the roster who offers a large enough offensive increase to justify taking Cirillo’s glove off the infield.
By the way, when do we finally talk about the remarkable emergence of the Patient Bret Boone. After drawing 3 walks tonight, he’s now 9th in the American Leauge with 17 in 116 AB. He’s walking once every 6.8 AB. Last year, he walked once every 11.47 AB. It was once every 15.75 AB in 2001. He now has a .393 on base percentage despite “only” hitting .293 at the moment. That OBP is .021 points higher than his year-end OBP in 2001 when he hit .331. If Boone is straying from his hack-a-matic past and his power doesn’t disappear, its possible that he could have an even better season than the season we’ve deemed as one of the great flukes of all time.
If I’m Mike Cameron, I ask my agent to see if the White Sox are interested in a Gold Glove CF this off-season. He kills the ball in that stadium, and if the Sox could find a taker for Carlos Lee — like, say, the M’s — they could play Cameron in center and prospect Joe Borchard in left.
Oh, and Colbrunn finally gets a start against a lefty, but in place of Edgar instead of Olerud? That doesn’t make much sense to me, but whatever. On the TV broadcast they made some claim about how Melvin decided to save Edgar for Colon since he’s a fastball hitter and Edgar hits fastballs so well, as opposed to today’s starter Josh Stewart who’s more of an off-speed guy. To me, the deciding factor should be that Olerud just isn’t as good against left-handed pitchers.
For all my carping about Melvin’s constant small-ball tactics, when I went to look it up this morning I found that Seattle, with 18 stolen bases and 6 times caugh-stealing, is only 8th in stolen bases (tied with Baltimore, and way behind Florida’s eye-popping 52). And we’re 19th caught-stealing, which overall puts us right next to the Yankees and Orioles, who have attempted 19 and 18 steals and been caught 6 and 5 times, respectively. And sacrifice hits (which is, bunts), the Mariners are middle of the pack.
I can’t reconcile this with my own observations: are the M’s running-and-attempting-the-run all the time, and laying down the bunt over and over until they get it right? That doesn’t seem like a rational conclusion, so here’s what I’ve started to think: that I’m so frustrated with the times that Melvin’s employing these tactics, particularly the sacrificing the runner from 1-2 and 2-3, that it seems like they’re doing it much more frequently.
Minor League Highlights for Friday, May 2
Iowa 4, Tacoma 3 (10 innings). The Rainiers seemed to have this game won after taking a 3-2 lead in the top of the 10th, but normally reliable RHP Aaron Taylor (1/3 IP, 3 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 1 BB, 0 K) blew his first save chance of the year and then lost the game in the bottom of the inning. RHP Ken Cloude (5 IP, 6 H, 2 R, 2 ER, 2 BB, 4 K) bounced back from getting his shelled in his last start, and RHP J.J. Putz worked three scoreless innings in relief (3 IP, 2 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 0 BB, 2 K). Offensively, CF Chad Meyers led the way with three hits in four trips plus a walk, and Jacques Landry had two hits including his 4th homer of the year.
San Antonio 3, Wichita 1. The Missions made it 13 in a row yesterday, giving them longest streak in the minors this season and tying their own Texas League record from 2001. RHP Rett Johnson won his third game of the year with six strong innings (3 H, 1 R, 1 ER, 2 BB, 6 K) and RHP Jared Hoerman (1 1/3 IP, 0 H, 0 R, 0 ER, 1 BB, 2 K) picked up his 7th save, tops in the system. The hitting star was LF Jaime Bubela, who doubled, tripled, scored and drove in two of the team’s three runs. 2B Jose Lopez added two hits and drove in the other run, and 3B Justin Leone scored twice. LHP Bobby Madritsch takes the hill today as San Antonio looks to set a new Texas League record. During the streak, the Missions have outscored their opponents by a 83-36 margin.
Modesto 8, Inland Empire 3. Neither LHP Glenn Bott nor RHPs Jeff Perez and Brian Strelitz were effective yesterday, combining to surrender twelve hits, six walks and three homers in a losing effort. The lone bright spot was 3B Hunter Brown, who went 3-4 with a double. The 66ers managed nine hits in the game, but were unable to put anything together offensively as they stranded ten runners. Brown’s double was the team’s only extra-base hit on the day. RHP Enmanuel Ulloa, recently demoted from San Antonio where he had been working in relief, gets the start today in Modesto.
Dayton 8, Wisconsin 1. The Timber Rattlers saw their eight-game winning streak come to a crashing halt yesterday in Dayton, scoring just one run despite nine hits. LHP Beau Hintz (5 1/3 IP, 3 R, 3 ER, 0 BB, 6 K) took the loss, though the real damage was done against RHP Rich Dorman (1 1/3 IP, 4 H, 4 R, 4 ER, 3 BB, 2 K). Offensively, three players — 2B Corey Harrington, RF T.J. Bohn and SS Michael Garciaparra — had two hits each. Harrington tripled, Bohn doubled and drove him in for the team’s only run, and Garciaparra added his 3rd steal of the year.
No question about it — Cameron’s GWGS is by far the #1 highlight of the season. Made that much better by the fact that all three members of the U.S.S. Mariner were in attendance, I might add.
Loaiza has been ridiculous this year, pulling a Derek Lowe 2002 type of performace so far — very few hits allowed, very few walks allowed. The low walk rate fits in with what he’s done in his career, as he’s always had pretty good control even when he was getting hit hard. And boy, has he ever gotten hit hard. Last year he allowed 192 hits in 151.1 innings, 239 in 190 the year before that, and 228 in 199.1 in 2000. I haven’t seen him pitch this season and I haven’t done any number crunching, but it sure seems like he’s either getting really lucky on balls hit in play this year, has gotten very good defense behind him or a bit of both. At the same time, he’s also striking out a hitter per inning this year, something he’s never even come close to before (his career high is 137 strikeouts and it took him 200 innings to do it) so maybe he really is doing something different this season.
Anyway, the point I was going to make is that I worry his style of pitching won’t sit well with the M’s. They’re a patient team, for the most part, and if Loaiza is throwing strikes they’re going to find themselves behind in the count quite a bit. I hate to sound like a cliched hitting instructor or color commentator, but perhaps this is one time you just have to go up there hacking, being aggressive and trying to hit a fastball early in the count rather than waiting around. Looking up his numbers right now I see he has posted a 6.59 ERA against the M’s in five starts over the past three years — 44 H in 28.2 IP, but just 5 BB — numbers which might lead you to believe they used that very plan of attack. Hmm, should be interesting what sort of approach they take at the plate.
Sure would be nice to take two out of three in Chicago, in any event.
Mariners at White Sox, with Support-Neutral Wins over an Average Starter:
Fri, RHP Franklin (-0.2) v RHP Loiza (1.5)
Sat, RHP Garcia (-0.1) v LHP Stewart (0.2) [will Colbrunn get the start against this lefty?]
Sun, RHP Meche (0.6) v RHP Colon (0.4)
(so that’s the M’s 4-1-5 guys by announced rotation at start-of-year)
Loiza’s been red-hot so far this year, Stewart hasn’t (offering a 1:1 bb/k ratio), and Colon’s been a little off his past form. The Mariners have hit better so far, though, and their bullpen is much better. I think the Meche v Colon game is going to be the coolest of the three, but frankly, I drank the Kool-Aid the Meche boosters were handing out a long time ago, and I’m still feeling the effects.
I’d like to also say that I think Mike Cameron’s game-winning grand slam is so far the greatest moment of the 2003 season.